Nonprofit Radio for October 12, 2026: Quantitative Fundraising Research

 

Russell James: Quantitative Fundraising Research

You can stop relying on conventional wisdom passed on through webinars and conferences. There’s a plethora of quantitative research on how to optimize storytelling to get your best fundraising outcomes. What is social emotion, how do you evoke it and why should you? How much story detail is not enough or too much? Better to talk about individuals or groups? What does the research reveal to maximize Planned Giving fundraising commitments? Professor Russell James of Texas Tech University walks us through what the research shows. (This originally aired September 23, 2024.)

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Welcome to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. I’m your aptly named host and the pod father of your favorite hebdomadal podcast. Oh, I’m glad you’re with us. My belly would ache with Helicobacter pylori if you missed this week’s show. Here’s our associate producer, Kate, with what’s on the menu. Hey Tony, we’re serving quantitative fundraising research. You can stop relying on conventional wisdom passed on through webinars and conferences. There’s a plethora of quantitative research on how to optimize storytelling to get your best fundraising outcomes. What is social emotion? How do you evoke it, and why should you? How much story detail is not enough or too much? Better to talk about individuals or groups. What does the research reveal to maximize planned giving fundraising commitments? Professor Russell James of Texas Tech University walks us through what the research shows. This originally aired September 23, 2024. On Tony’s take too. Thank you, Russell James. Here is quantitative fundraising research. It’s a genuine pleasure to welcome back Russell James to nonprofit Radio. He is a chaired professor in the Department of Personal Financial Planning at Texas Tech University. He directs the on-campus and online graduate program in charitable financial planning, AKA planned giving. He has published research in more than 75 peer-reviewed scientific journal and law review articles. Russell has a law degree. He’s the author of several books, including The Storytelling Fundraiser, The Epic Fundraiser, The Primal Fundraiser, The Socratic Fundraiser. And I don’t know where this title came from, Inside the Mind of the bequest Donor and Visual Planned Giving. Uh, those are outliers. And there’s a new book coming, we may talk about that if he’s willing. Texas Tech University, you’ll find at TTU.edu and you’ll find Russell on LinkedIn. Welcome back, Russell. It’s good to see you. Thanks so much. Great to see you as well, Tony. Thank you. It’s been several years since you were on nonprofit radio. I regret that. I regret that. It’s a, it’s a mistake I’ll try not to, uh, make a second time. Um, would you like to say anything about your, uh, upcoming book, or is it a complete, it’s a secret and we can’t talk about it? Uh, so the upcoming book is called The Biblical Fundraiser, Helping Christians Enjoy their wealth and, uh, certainly taking a, a, a very specific perspective on that. Not something that I teach here at the state university. But something that is of interest to some folks, so I’ll be happy to share that one as well. The first of 2025 should be available. I’m sharing it with a few beta readers right now and trying to get all the kinks worked out. And I’m, I’m one of them. I haven’t gotten back yet, but, uh, but I will. Am I too late? No, no, no, OK. You’re, OK. I thought not, right? I, I’m, I’m not gonna be able to read the entire book, but I will read, I will read some, and I will give you my honest feedback to, uh, the biblical fundraiser, which fits in line with your, most of your other, your other titles, the storytelling fundraiser, the epic fundraiser, etc. So the biblical fundraiser. All right. So we’re gonna like to talk about some. The research, the research, see what’s, what’s fantastic about having you is that this is not, well, this is kind of the way I learned it. Well, you know, the way we’ve always done it is, um, uh, you know, the way I’ve always done it, you know, is the way the fundraisers will sometimes say. So we have empirical research, uh, and I often cite your research, um, in, uh, in my trainings. And so we, we wanna talk about the research today in, uh, use of, use of language, some things to talk about, topics to talk about, topics to steer clear of, etc. Let’s start with empathy, uh, in, in storytelling. You, you’re, uh, you emphasize that this is really essential for people to get that motivation to give the empathy. Yeah, absolutely. So, you know, this is not a shock, right? The idea that our philanthropic or charitable impulses are going to involve empathy, I think it helps to understand a little bit about the processes behind making that happen, because really, Our goal in this space is to evoke a clear image that will generate some kind of a social emotion like like empathy. Now if we’re going to do that, I like to talk about the idea that what really helps is to make it specific. Make it simple and of course ultimately make it empathetic. So, so we do have to create this internal visualization to to really trigger those kinds of, Social emotion. If we don’t, uh, it’s, I, I, I like to put it this way, um, in order to get people to feel something, we, we’ve got to first help them to see something and that means we’ve got to present that clear image of course what they see ultimately must be empathetic, otherwise they’re not going to be moved to do anything, but oftentimes in our messaging, even that first part is where we trip up. And you even have neuroimaging research to, to, to back up. But see, this is, this is empirical. This is not, this is not, well, I feel like this, you know, it has intuitive appeal. So it’s just, you know, that’s what, that, that’s what we should do. You have neuroimaging research to back up, uh, a lot of what you just said about people seeing something and then feeling. Yeah, absolutely. So this is an area where we see what I like to call triangulation. In other words, lots of experimental research, different people get exposed to different things and we see how they, uh, how they respond, how do they give or not give, but also some of the things that I do. So here at Texas Tech Neuroimaging Institute, we’ll stick people in brain scanners. Have them make charitable decisions, volunteering decisions, uh, even, uh, I, I do a lot of work in plan giving, so we’ll have people do their estate planning while they’re in the brain scanner and ask them about including different charities and, and through that process we learn about what does it look like in the brain when people decide to be. Charitable and it turns out that one of the important components of that process is an internal visualization uh for those planned gifts, gifts and wills it’s really about an autobiographical visualization that is people kind of taking an outside perspective on themselves, but we see it in other research even with smaller gifts it’s it it really needs. To start with creating that imagery or vision that is going to then lead to the social emotion and that doesn’t mean that the communication must itself be visual, although that’s fine and can be helpful it more means that a person can internally visualize what the impact of their gift is going to be. So I’m, I’m. Dying to know what this brain scanner device looks like because most people who are not, who are, most people who are writing charitable checks, you know, do not have a brain image scanner, you know, in their home. So, uh, so how do you, uh, you know, you’re trying to recreate the giving experience as best you can in a, an experiential, I mean, experimental, you know, research setting. What does this look like? Is this a room that people walk into and the room is equipped with, Image imaging devices or are they, you know, like a little bell code or what are they, what are they in while they’re, yeah, so this is your research subjects exactly. So this is exactly the sort of thing you would walk into at a high-end hospital. This is, it’s called, it’s an MRI machine and the person physically is laying on a table, goes into the MRI machine, and then the way it works. We actually have their head in the center of the MRI machine and they’re looking at what is actually a mirror, but that mirror projects what we can put on a screen and so anything you can see on a computer screen, you can see in that and then they have different response buttons so they can make choices and you set it up to make it as real world as possible. So for example, if they were making. As real world as possible, putting aside the fact that they’re laying on the laying down their supine in an MRI scanner. OK, well, putting that aside, it’s as realistic as possible. So, so, so setting that aside, and part of what we do is we make sure that they’re used to the environment. We have them, um, yeah, and answer questions on various other things, so it, you know, isn’t like strange for them by the time we’re getting to. The things we’re interested in, um, and so how do we make it realistic? Well, with, with small dollar decisions we make it real money, right? We make it like this is they, you, you, this is an amount of money that you’re getting paid. You can choose to share some of it because you, you get paid at the end of the process or you don’t have to share some of it. Uh, then with the estate planning part of it is to say, hey, we’re gonna mail to you legally valid last will and testimony. No charge to you. You just got to answer the questions while you’re in the, the brain scanner. So, so those are some examples of how we try to make it real decisions, um, as we are scanning a variety of these, uh, uh, these processes. And the thing I like to emphasize there is that what we see is triangulation, meaning that we’re not the results that we’re seeing in the brain scanner. are connecting with, they’re triangulating with what we’re seeing from experimental research, sometimes even what we’re seeing from data uh in uh in large surveys, that sort of thing, and that’s when we start to get more confident about the answer, saying. No, no, this is, this is true. You can look at it through widely different methodologies and, uh, you come up with the same answer. That’s where we get more confidence about those answers. I see, right. So each, each of the three legs of the triangle is supporting the other and that, that leads you to the most, uh, most confident conclusions. Right, right. I can give you an example, uh, of, of that, uh, in, uh, in, in plan giving if you’d like, but, uh, so, so just to kind of, uh, go, don’t, uh, don’t tease us, and then, and then we go on to a different subject. I do have a question for you about the brain scan, uh, but give the example that you’re thinking of. So, uh, there was a really cool in-depth qualitative research of, uh, This was done by Doctor Claire Rowley in the UK of people who had included a gift to charity in their wills asking them about what motivated them to do so, why did they pick those organizations, and one of the ultimate conclusions of that was it was really about the donor’s life story, right? It was about it wasn’t so much the next project the charity was doing, it was about connection to the life story. Then when we scanned that. Type of decision making process in the brain scanner we see that what predicts including a particular charity is a dramatic ramp up in brain activation in brain areas that you might call visualized autobiography. These are regions of the brain that that tend to activate when people are mentally traveling back in time or. Thinking back across their life, uh, so they’re internally visualizing while taking an outside perspective on themselves. So then we take both of those things and we use it in an experiment where we were testing, uh, about 30 different ways to phrase the charitable gift in a will, uh, and trying to come up with what are people most interested in doing in the phrasing and it turns out that, um. We could really increase people’s interest. We, we start with our sort of best base performing phrase, which is to describe it as a gift in a will rather than some of the more technical terms we could use, but we could ramp that up if we ask them about their interest in a gift in a charitable gift in a will to support causes that have been important in your life. And in fact when we add that phrase onto almost any plan giving description to support causes that uh to support causes that have been important in your life, it really ramps up people’s interest in making those kinds of gifts. Well, what we, what we’re doing is we’re trying to trigger, by the way we’re phrasing the question, a life review process because look, nobody wants to be that guy who says no causes have been important in my life, right? It makes you think about. Your life review connections, your life story connections to different causes, and we know from the brain scanner that’s what triggers these decisions. So that’s an example where we get all three different kinds of research in-depth qualitative brain scanning research and experimental testing, and we can come up with something that’s functionally useful. I got to pull on this thread, even though it’s a digression. I still got, I gotta pull a little more. Is there, do we know anything about age dependency? So if you’re, if you’re, if reflecting back on the causes that have been important to you in your life is, is a, a valuable phrase to add, the more years you have to reflect back on, so if you’re 60, are you more likely to be moved by that phrase than if you’re 30? So we didn’t find an age difference in that specific phrase, but we found a related age difference. So one of the things that can really ramp up interest in a gift in a will is if we ask people about do you have a family member who would have appreciated for a deceased family member would appreciate your support of this kind of a cause, and if so, tell us about their connection to the cause and then. If you match that with the opportunity to make a gift and a will in honor of or in memory of that that loved one, that process actually can dramatically ramp up interest in leaving a bequest gift to an organization. Now two things about that one, that process is significantly more impactful for older adults, and it’s not so much. That when they have a family member connection, especially with the deceased family member, that the, uh, that the hit or the increase in interest is so much greater, it’s that as people age they’re more likely to have deceased family members who um they have these connections with and it turns out that deceased family members more powerful connection than living family members and it tends to be um. Deceased ascendants, uh, not descendants, uh, and in particular female ascendants, uh, tend to drive these, uh, these kinds of things. So, so that’s an example where we have an intervention that is age dependent for exactly the same reason that you mentioned, uh, that they’re more likely to have those kinds of connections, have those folks who have died in their lives. It sounds, so it sounds like mother and grandmother. They, they, they would do, they would do much better than, uh, son. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Friends don’t work, uh, descendants don’t work, but ascendants, uh, uh, grandmother number one, then aunt, uh, then mother, uh, father was statistically insignificant. Father, fatherhood statistically insignificant, mother less significant than aunt or grandmother. Yeah, Ace said the more you move up then, and part of it is just that we don’t leave money to those people so we can use a gift because we, we wouldn’t give it directly to them. OK. All right, let’s go back, uh, so back to where we were. I, I asked you to, I, yeah, no, it’s my fault for, uh, pursuing the digression. But, uh, all right, so now back to the brain scanning. Uh, is there an MD in the room with you? I mean, in case the person needs some anesthesia or something, or they freak out in the MRI or have you pre-scanned people who are OK in MRI machines? So, um, we have, uh, so the research that I’m doing is just part of the Texas Tech Neuroimaging Institute and of course I’ll have a co-author on all of these that, uh, that has worked with this and so sort of pre-existing systems set up for those, uh, those sorts of things. But yeah, we’ve had some interesting things and, and in fact one of the things that we do, uh, just for such an event, uh, because we schedule. People for these, you know, 45 minute sessions and all of that, and we, we pay for the time, which is expensive time on the machine, is I’ll hire grad students to just sit there and do homework all day because if somebody freaks out in the machine, presses the button, says I don’t, yeah, I can’t do this, I’m out, we need to have somebody that is uh that is going in there as well. So that does happen from time to time. Is it true that charitable giving activates the same centers of the brain as Uh, eating chocolate, or the, the, is that the hypothalamus or the, the pleasure centers and eating chocolate. I always see the two, not that often, but through the years I’ve seen the two analogized. Charitable giving and eating chocolate, activates a pleasure, charitable giving activates the same pleasure center. Uh, uh, is that, is that true or is that a wives’s tale? Well, you know, it, it’s true to the extent that, um, charitable giving is enjoyable. Uh, and so we do see activation in, in the brain, and it turns out there’s some cool research that shows charitable giving is really enjoyable, but if they’re doing the exact same thing without being able to choose it, so it’s taxation rather than charitable giving, that, that turns out to be not so much fun. I, I know, shocking result, right? Uh, but, uh, uh, so it, it does activate these reward centers, um, so, you know, I, I guess a slightly. more accurate way to think of it is that it activates the reward center rather than the the the same reward center, you know, in the sense of, oh, there’s one, there’s one part of the brain that only reacts to chocolate and giving, right? It’s like, no, this is the more generic network that’s used that is indicating a a reward in the brain. OK, activates the reward center. Is it the hypothalamus or do I have that wrong? Uh, so that’s not what we’re seeing in a lot of our more ventral striatum and some of, some of the other, um, uh, uh, areas that, that engage, but to, to be honest with you, most of these things like reward, uh, they, uh, occur through a network and so you’ll actually get activations that simultaneous. ta ne ous activations in multiple areas, uh, and, uh, and so there are different pieces that, that, that are involved. So it tends to be networks rather than just one location does, does one thing. Although certainly if, uh, if there’s damage or interference to one location in a network, it can mess up the whole thing. OK, cool. Thank you. All right, so refining my, uh, my thinking. Through the years. OK. And my, my analogizing? All right, so it’s the reward center, activate the reward center. Um. So, all right, let’s, let’s drill down to some of the details of your years of research, um, and others. You cite lots of other people in, in some of your, some of your trainings. Um, the details of individuals, in details of individuals are better than generic type individuals in, in, in storytelling. Yeah, yeah, you know, so this is something that comes back to that notion that um we’ve got to create an image and it needs to be an empathetic image. Now the challenge is that. Oftentimes, the underlying issue we’re working with has real complexity in that issue, and that complexity is true, but it’s not motivational. And so whenever there is a a randomly assigned experiment between a simple story involving a single person, this is known as the identifiable victim effect, that people are going to give. More to that and to the extent that you make that story more complex, people will give less. So, so real simple example, um, if uh in one experiment where the total cost to save 1 child or 8 children was exactly the same. With the story of one child, 90% of people donated for that. But if you told the story with 8 children, only 58% donated to it, and we kind of see this again and again whenever we make the story more complicated, um, and it’s harder to easily visualize, uh, then we don’t get that social emotional response and when we tamp down that social emotional response, then we tend not to get giving now this comes. Up all the time whenever people start leading with numbers, you know, this idea of let’s talk about, you know, the impact in terms of the hundreds or the thousands or the tens of thousands, and you know from an accounting perspective we’d love that. It sounds like impact, but that is not visualizable and so it turns out that when we Lead with numbers that is not going to engage the social emotional regions of the brain. It lets the brain know, hey, this is a math problem, and we’re going to engage those math error detecting part of the brains, the sort of accountant part of the brains, and that is not going to trigger. The kind of social emotion that that is necessary to begin the philanthropic process now this does not mean don’t ever talk about numbers. It means don’t start with numbers you’ve got to start with that motivational image of impact and then for some people they’ll be interested in numbers and so after you have kind of. That motivation going of the visualizable impact, then you can tamp down their their error detection mathematics side by providing sufficient information or at least access to that information. Don’t push it on them because many people only need a limit. You go too far. If you go too far, then you’re starting to reemphasize the mathematical again. And it’s gonna start to blunt the visual, the visual, visual it’ll get exhausting and you know, right, so, so make it accessible and available on the data because you know you’ll get an engineer or somebody who just loves diving into that. That’s fine, but don’t ever lead with that. We wanna think of it this way, um, the, the, that social emotional imagery, that’s the. Engine in the kind of philanthropy decision making car whereas the math and the numbers and the error detection, that’s the brake on the car so you do for some people have to get them to move their foot off the brake to, to, you know, at some point, right? But the point is if you haven’t started the engine, you spend all day getting that foot off the brake. Not gonna go anywhere. People will nod and say, oh yes, I understand, but they’re not gonna give. They’re not gonna actually do something, whereas if you start the engine first, that, oh, this is exciting. I can visualize it. I can see it. I, I, I, I want to make this happen, then it matters whether you get them to take the foot off the brake. And even more so when you add identity to the, to the individual that you’re, that you’re leading the story with. So, right, like if you had name, age, these, those factors are, will increase the giving over just, you know, just, it’s just Sarah. Exactly. So anytime we can add and, or even worse, an eight year old. Right, so any time we can add a few, and I emphasize a few details that helps me create an image of the impact that I’m going to have, that’s going to increase the likelihood of uh making the gift. Now the reason I emphasize few is we find that. If you just keep going and adding 89, 10 details, now you’re making it too complex. Now, uh, the social, emotional reaction tends to go down. It tends to get more exhausting, and so that’s why it’s that notion of you want to have this clear, simple image that evokes the social emotional response. So what belongs like a name, age. Uh, I don’t know, location, maybe the, the town that they’re in, if, let’s say it’s a disaster relief or something. Name, age, and city, is that, that’s not going too far? Yeah, yeah, so, you know, in general, for example, a lot of the tests are done with, uh, you know, let’s say, uh, you just get the uh description without the name. Adding a name helps if you get the name, but you can’t see the person, being able to see the person or an image of the person, uh, that helps. Um, so adding a name and picture, uh, that is generally going to, uh, going to be uh uh very positive and it’s just like. Other good storytelling, right? If you start reading a story and it says introducing character number 1 and then you have like 5 paragraphs of details on them, like we don’t want to read that story, right? But if you know as we learn about the person and during the course of this, the story and what’s happening and the impact of detail here or there helps make it more emotional or easy to visualize, then that’s helpful for the story. It’s time for Tony’s take 2. I want to extend thanks to Russell James since he’s in this week’s, uh, show from the archive. Because He wrote the foreword to my book, which I’m very grateful for. And I’m not kidding, the first time I read the foreword that he sent me, I, I, I was, I was tearful. Uh, it was so moving, uh, and he, you know, very graciously said, if you want me to change anything, let me know. And I said, not a comma should you change. It’s just glorious and Um, giving. The way it is. Exactly. Don’t change a thing. Um, because, you know, it’s, um, it’s very gratifying. Here’s a professor at Texas Tech University, and he agrees, well, and his area of research is planned giving fundraising. That’s what he does. Some professors study chemistry, some study history, he studies planned giving fundraising. Which is why I’m. Repeating his show because his, his research is outstanding. It’s valuable. It’s really valuable. So, Um, for him to agree with my philosophy of launching planned giving. At small and mid-size nonprofits, as explained in my book. is very Touching and gratifying, uh, you know, to be, to be validated by a Quantitative researcher in planned giving fundraising. Because I’m not that. I’m a practitioner. 29 years, but, uh, you know, you could say, well, 29 years, all you got is a bunch of anecdotes, 29 years’ worth of anecdotes. So, to be validated by Russell James and his research. Well, no, his research didn’t write the foreword, he did. So to be validated by Russell James is, um, It’s very gratifying. It’s very fulfilling. So, I say thank you. Thank you, Russell James for writing the foreword and for Agreeing with and validating my thinking and methodology of launching planned giving at small and mid-sized nonprofits. Thank you very much. That is Tony’s take too. Kate Do not remove a comma. I like that compliment. That’s real sweet. Not a comma that I want changed. Not a comma, not a comma. No. We’ve got Beu butt loads more time. Here’s the rest of quantitative fundraising research with Russell James. You also have Really interesting research on, on groups. If, if it’s, if it’s a group of 8, and they seem individual, that, uh, is less motivating, I guess less social emotion than a group of 8 that are cohesive, uh, a cohesive group. Right. And so this comes back to being able to to envision a single character, OK? So for example, if I’ve got a story of the, uh, you know, the one child versus the 8, the 8’s harder to visualize, too much going on there, the one is, uh, is, uh, going to outperform. But if that 8 or say 5 in one of the experiments, uh, It was actually 6 children in one of the experiments. If they were described as siblings as part of a family, well then that negative effect went away because now I’m kind of dealing with one character in the sense of one group, and we see this in like really weird ways also, like for example, if you’re giving to a butterfly sanctuary and the butterflies appear to come. Across the video screen all moving in unison as one unified group versus they do what butterflies always do, which is to just be scattered and bouncing around. People give more when it’s that group image, and so this is kind of this consistent result. There’s another study that showed the same thing with gazelles and you know, the idea is that what is an easier character to empathize with. We can’t really empathize with a dozen or 20 different characters at once, but if that 20 or 50 characters becomes a group, then we say, oh, this is a character. I can identify with this group as a character, and that makes for a better story, meaning that easier to visualize, easier to have empathy for, and it generates uh more likelihood of giving. What about the, the cohesive group versus an individual? The individual story, does the individual still do better in, in terms of giving outcomes than the cohesive group? Right, yeah, so, uh, so identifiable victim effect, to use the technical term, always gonna outperform, um, then if it’s a bunch of, uh, you know, uh, recipients, individuals, animals, whatever it is, then that’s gonna perform worse, but if we describe them as a cohesive group with a specific, you know, kind of, uh, story to that group. Then that’s gonna outperform the sort of uh scattered, uh, you know, the numbers story. In other words, we’re we’re trying to um reduce the negative impact from talking about numbers by just talking about one group and this is, you know, this, especially if it’s a family that’s a cohesive group or, um, you know, a tribe or a uh a a community whatever that makes it OK, now we’re back to the story about one character in essence. OK. But the one identifiable victim always. Out outperforms yeah in these in these small gift decisions it does. OK, yeah, that’s what we’re talking about. All right, um. Are, are there other layers to the research? I mean, I, I, I wanna get to talking about tax deductions versus tax savings things, but before we get there, uh, are there other layers to the research that you wanna, you wanna share with the listeners? You know, I, I think uh if I could share just one thing, uh, and this I’m borrowing it from actually a script consultant, uh, uh, Michael Haag, uh, who, uh, you know, works with not only scriptwriters but even CEOs on what their message is, and he always says, number one problem, very simply, Their stories are way too complicated, and this is the constant challenge in the fundraising space is how do we create a message that is an appropriate representation of the scenario, so we want it to be accurate. But complexity kills empathy. It kills giving and so, so that’s always the, the notion of how do we have that story be something that is simple, uh, straightforward, and uh it evokes that that emotion. So again, the, the reason this is such a big challenge is if you let nonfun. Fundraising people, administrators get involved with uh writing your fundraising copy, they’re gonna kill it because they’re gonna make it more complex because they live in a world of complexity and they want to sort of force the donors to, they need to understand all of this like, no, no, no, that, that, that’s, we can put that in, put, put that in the annual report. Exactly, exactly. All right, all right, um, so let’s talk about including some of the mathematics. Uh, in, in terms of talking about tax deductions or tax savings, different types of gifts. Now I know, now I think we’re moving away from the small dollar gifts. We’re moving to the more structured, you know, planned gift, like gift annuities, uh, maybe stock, you know, stock gifts as well, but, but we, that’s OK. You know, we’ve, we’ve spent a good amount of time on the small dollar giving decisions. Um, let’s go to the, the, the, yeah, the, I mean, the more, the more nuanced gifts. And, and talk about tax, tax deductions, tax savings. What, what’s the research there? Yeah, so one of the things to keep in mind that oftentimes gets confused, especially in the fundraising space, is that the tax benefits are not about motivating the gift. They’re about reducing the cost of the gift, making it smarter, making it more attractive. So oftentimes fundraisers, um, they, they, uh, get bad information, uh, and, and, uh, it, it sort of has legs because it’s something that they sort of want to believe, uh, but the bad information is that, uh, tax benefits don’t matter. And since they don’t matter, hey, you don’t have to learn about them, right? So that’s a. Lovely message for fundraisers makes your life easier. It’s just not true. And uh so let me explain what I mean by that. It’s not true like empirically, uh, we can definitely see nationally that, uh, tax deductions make a difference. And one of the ways statistically we can identify this is that although people’s incomes go up at $1 at a time, their tax benefits, which are based upon the income bracket tax. Bracket they’re in don’t go up a dollar at a time. They have these hard break points at different places, so we can separate those two things and we can see where, oh, that tax benefit went way up here and the, the behavior, uh, we, we see that as well. Of course there’s also different things that we can compare year over year. Um, we can also do this experimentally, uh, just asking people about interest in, uh, for example, in, in one of our studies we compared, uh, asking people about. Are you interested in learning about making a gift or are you interested in making a gift of stocks or bonds to charity, uh, versus are you interested in avoiding, uh, capital gains tax by making a gift of stocks or bonds to charity, uh, and about halffold more people were interested in, in the, in the second thing, uh, so again, it’s important to understand that. What sometimes the bad information comes from this approach where you’ll have an organization or a consulting firm says, hey, we wanna learn why people give and so they’ll, you know, send out surveys and say, um, here’s different reasons people give, which of them apply to you, and some of them will be, you know, because I want to change the world because of my values, that’s how it’s brought up because of. You know, the impact I want to make and then one of the options will be, uh, because I want tax benefits, right, and people don’t choose it. No, nobody chooses that because you look, you feel like you’re a petty person. What kind of, what kind of altruist am I if, if I’m giving for the, for the petty pecuniary reason, right? And this is in fact a very common issue in social science research. And something that we’re well aware of and it’s why we don’t test things in that way, you know, if you ask people for their motivations, you’ll get the socially approved motivations. And so that’s why we test them in different ways, you know, randomly assigning them to different descriptions and notice what happens to the impact and or looking at the national data and and all of that. So all to say that. It makes an impact. It’s not the motivation, but it does lower cost and price matters. I mean, look, Economics 101, price matters and whether you’re talking about smoking cigarettes or, or making gifts, price matters. It’s not the motivation, but it does matter and so it is helpful to to. Uh, mention these things. Um, now can we, can I reference your graph, uh, that you, you rely on sometimes where you’ve got motivation and cost, and as cost goes down and motivation goes up, where the two cross, that’s a giving decision. So if we can bring the cost down. Then maybe a little less motivation is required. Yeah, oh, you know, and the other way to think of it is, you know, look, Tony, you could get me intensely motivated to make a $10 million gift to Texas Tech University to build a new library building. I, I, I don’t have it, so you know, the cost is too much, right? So you’re gonna have to lower that cost in order for me to participate. Uh, this is also true at kind of a smaller scale where, uh, we see that, that, that cost does, uh, does matter. And so there’s another interesting thing about that that it’s not just about, uh, cost mattering, but it’s also about the way that we. Frame that benefit that is coming in. So for example, and this is real consistent across a lot of economic experiments, and that is that if you describe the benefit as a matching where, OK, you’re gonna give $1 then this, this other organization is gonna, you know, give 50 cents or $1. Or whatever that is more motivational than if we describe the economically identical result as a rebate or a refund. In other words, well, you give $2 and then they’ll give you $1 back. Now, to an economist or an accountant, those are identical, right? The net cost is the same in both cases. The, the net to the charity is the same in both, both cases, but the story is different. So if I can use terms that describe it in a matching framework, which is to say, well, you put this in and then it gets matched and that increases your impact. Well, that’s a very charitable story and it’s also me not only being philanthropic, but I’m being uh intelligently philanthropic. I’m making an even bigger impact. Whereas if you frame it as a refund or a rebate, well, I’m a little philanthropic, but I’m also getting something out of the deal too, and so I, you know, so it kind of messes it up. Now, you could look at that and say, well, everybody does matching gifts, nobody does refunds on gifts like why do we care? Well, we care because the tax system is set up as a refund system, essentially a rebate system because you give and then on your, your tax return, you know, you get this, uh, this rebate back or, or this tax benefit back. So we can’t change the system, but we can change the language that we use to describe those tax benefits. We’re not going to describe them as, hey. You make a gift and here’s the, you know, here’s the killing you can make on your tax return. This is a, a, a, a, a great benefit to you. We want to describe it more in matching terms that your gift can become more powerful when uh you get the government to kick in their share uh through these kinds of uh of benefits and so that’s how we use that kind of experimental research. All right, uh, fascinating. Um. What about the, uh, what about simple gifts and wills where there, there isn’t a tax implication, uh, for, for the vast majority of donors. I mean, the, The annual estate, the estate tax exclusion, not the annual, the estate tax exclusion now is what, $13.6 million I think per, per person, for a couple, right, double for married. All right, so 99.9%. So, you know, well, let’s exclude the, uh, the 0.11% that is gonna benefit from that. Uh, so, so there isn’t a tax implication to making a charitable gift by will, simple charitable bequest. What, do you have advice about messaging that? Yeah, so, uh, so a couple of different things. Uh, first, um, I will, uh, again, coming from, uh, Department of Financial Planning, uh, if we want to talk about taxes, what I’m gonna do is start out the conversation by saying, um, that, uh, you know, any of that money in your IRA or 401k, any of that that goes to your family, they’re gonna have to pay income taxes on that when they take it out. And in fact, the new rules, they got to take it out even. Faster than before, but any of that that you name to go to our organization, no income taxes on any of that. Now I mentioned that because as a financial planner, the very first dollars we want to send to charity in the estate is the qualified plan money that is the IRA 401k, um, and so they’re, so they don’t have estate tax issues in their estate planning, but they do have income tax issues in their estate planning. So, so that can be a way to, to get into that conversation. But it is interesting how the gift in a will is fundamentally a different decision than the uh current giving decision, uh, and we see that the that the behavior itself is different as well. Now part of the reason that it’s different is that it’s about planning for your own death and most people, um, that’s not their favorite subject. There’s a bit of avoidance that goes on with that, um, so, so there’s a couple of different things that we see here. One is what’s the most powerful way to get in a will. Honestly, it’s to just be top of the mind at the right time when some other life event happens and people are going through that process and by top of the mind, I mean, oh it’s just sharing stories about, oh yeah, people like us include gifts and wills uh all the time that uh benefit the organization and reflect their life story and so it’s just kind of this constant communication because one thing we see from some pretty cool experiments is that uh this charitable. Giving decision in the will is relatively fluid. Like, uh, uh, so for example, there was one experiment, 1000 people went through the normal will planning process, uh, didn’t have any specific question about a gift to charity. 4.9% of those people included a gift to charity. Another 1000 people had the same questions, but one extra question. Would you like to leave anything to charity? 10.3% of those people. Included a gift to charity, so you more than double it just by being top of the mind, right? And so that is kind of the, the, the first step. Now there’s a second step involved if you want to get to the really major gifts or the substantial kind of, uh, uh, inheritances, and that deals with the second stage response to being reminded that we’re going to pass away. First stage response is just avoidance. Like I don’t really want. Deal with that. If you get past that, the second stage response is technically called the pursuit of symbolic immortality. This is the notion that, OK, I’m gonna disappear, but some impact of mine will continue on after I’m gone. And so if a charity can provide an opportunity for a gift that reflects that person’s life story, then they’ll be included in the plan. If they can provide an opportunity that also provides some permanence or sense of permanence, that’s when those major gifts come in. Uh, so for example, uh, whether that’s an endowment, uh, for a particular part of the operations, you know, at the universities we have professorships and scholarships or in financial planning, private family foundations or, uh, some of the donor advice fund substitutes for that. In fact, believe it or not, Tony, if we go back to 2007 when the exemption levels were down to $5 million so we were able to see more of that data, this is a number that’s gonna blow your mind. In 2007, um, actually, a, a, uh, when we look at the total charitable bequest giving that’s taking place, 78% of the dollars for estates $5 million and above went to private family foundations. Now, that means only 22% are going to actual public charities. Psychologically, that’s important because we know that the private family foundation is kind of the ultimate expression of symbolic immortality. It’s named for the donor or the donor’s family. It’s legally required to follow his rules or her rules or values forever and it’s intended to live, you know, forever. Permanently to continue making that impact indefinitely that even after the donor is gone and so why that is important is to understand that any time we can replicate some piece of that private foundation experience for our donors, that’s what’s going to drive these major life investment gifts and honestly. That that’s actually what we see in any big giving, not just the estate giving, is that it will come with instructions. It is the donor’s instructions that make that gift motivational. And so, the study that came out about 18 months ago from Case looking at the largest gifts that were received from all different levels of colleges and universities. When it analyzed those largest gifts, only 14% of those gifts included even a single dollar that was unrestricted. You know, the bulk of them went for endowments. Some went for buildings. It is that sense of symbolic permanence. Yes, endowments, buildings. There’s no, there’s no, there’s no, there’s no more permanence than a building, that come out. So, something that reflects my values and life story that lives on beyond me. And so, I mean, fundraisers would say perpetuity. You, you, you’re the researcher and you’re saying, you know, symbolic permanence, but we would say perpetuity, maybe not in talking to donors, but in trying to, uh, you know, just internally trying to encourage these types of gifts that, that, uh, the donors. Values will live on. It’s interesting, you don’t, you don’t use the word legacy. So I don’t, yeah, go ahead. Uh, it doesn’t matter what I, because you’re the researcher, so we tested a bunch of these phrases, right, about what, what works best. So for example, do people want to, are they interested in making a gift in a will? Do they want to read about will planning? Are they interested in making a legacy gift? They don’t want to read about legacy planning. Are they interested in estate gift? They want to read about estate planning. It turns. Out the most attractive term is simply gift in a will, uh, or will planning. Why is that? Some qualitative research unpacked this a bit, uh, and that is for a lot of people when we start using terms like estate or legacy, they feel like those terms don’t apply to them. They’re a bit too grand. You know, oh, an estate that’s like for the people on Downton Abbey who go riding their ponies across the vale in the morning, but it doesn’t really apply to me, but oh, a gift and a will, yeah, everybody needs a will. And so there is that barrier with some of these terms that the legacy is absolutely the right idea, but sometimes that the term itself can be, um, it’s not quite as attractive. OK. I, I can say that my anecdotal experience over 27 years doing Planned Giving is identical to that. Uh, uh, I’ve, I’ve turned in my early years, I saw people, you know, they, they just would bristle at the idea of a legacy. That, that, that’s for the, the Gates and the Bloombergs. Uh, you know, now it’s for the, for the Taylor Swift’s and the Elon Musk’s, uh, right? It’s, I don’t have a legacy. I mean, we all do have a legacy. And you’re making that point. You’re saying the concept is right, but the phrase. Um, uh, so I’ve, yeah, so for, for a long time I’ve been training that that’s not the best way to talk to people about their legacy when you’re talking to folks of normal modest means. Just talk about, you know, longevity and the, the importance of your mission in the community, etc. but not their legacy. And, and to, to agree with that, yeah, and to agree with that even more, one of the things we find is that you, you don’t actually have to be selling a permanent. Its structure you can just use permanence language to describe the impact of your organization. So this was a really cool experiment where people were at the end of the experiment they had an opportunity to make a gift and it was always to the same organization in poverty relief organization. In one case it was described as making an immediate impact on the lives of people, and in the other it was described something along the lines of Making a permanent impact that will benefit people in the future. Well, it turns out that for just the normal group that wasn’t reminded of their death, wasn’t doing estate planning, it was better to talk about the immediate impact. But for the group that had first been reminded of their own mortality, which of course happens in the estate planning process, for that group, uh, that immediate impact message did not work at all. People did not donate to that, uh, they donate very little to that. But they actually donated 3 times as much if you describe the organization as making lasting improvements that would benefit people in the future and that just sort of psychologically shows the attraction in these death-related contexts of permanence. We found the same thing when we were trying to figure out how do you get somebody to make a second memorial gift in honor of a deceased loved one, you know, the first one happens at the funeral and like, OK, I’m. Making a gift to the organization, but the organization never gets a second gift. So what we found, we tested a bunch of different messages. The most powerful message to increase the likelihood and the size of a second gift is to have an opportunity that if we hit this goal for total giving in honor of this person, the fund becomes a permanent fund. So again, that same notion of anything death related, if we can offer permanence, that is super attractive. Interesting. That has, that has a lot of implications for, I’m thinking of healthcare specifically, where there are so many gifts in honor, uh, or on hospice, right? Someone, someone dies in a hospice facility and the family says, you know, gifts to, in lieu of flowers, please make gifts to the hospice. And people do it, but they do it, they do it once, and, and you never hear from those donors again. So there’s a way, uh, it’s not exclusive to healthcare, but that’s the first thing that comes to mind because there’s a death often in healthcare and, and, uh, related, related work. So, uh, all right, bringing those folks back for a second time with, uh, with permanence again. There’s that, there’s that implied. Uh, implied, uh, what did you call it, no, so, so the pursuit of symbolic immortality, symbolic immortality. I love that symbolic mortality. It will catch up. And in fact, if you want to make it super powerful, then you communicate for the second gift. Near the anniversary of the person they made, uh, the anniversary of the passing of the person they made the gift in honor of because that really elicits that kind of mortality reminder very strongly, and then that causes the attraction to the permanence outcome. Interesting. All right, this is, this is bordering on manipulative because you want the, oh my God, it’s been a year since she died. I can’t believe it’s been a year now. So you’re saying, you know, capitalize on the, uh, I’ll avoid using the word, I’ll avoid using the word exploit capitalize on the anniversary. Yeah, so we can think of it in the sense of we’re providing this positive experience and so when is that positive experience going to be of most interest? Well, it’s. When that sense of impermanence is the strongest, that sense of loss, uh, that is the strongest, that’s when this particular, uh, you know, experience or product that we’re offering, it really hits the spot when it becomes of, of most interest. All right. I know the cynic would say, you’re manipulating people. You’re taking advantage, you know, but this is fun. It’s, it’s, uh, I’m not that cynic. I was just, I was musing a little bit. All right. But yeah, really, you know, this is, uh, it’s quite valuable. Um, not only the groundbreaking parts that are new, but the, uh, unwinding of the, The old saws that are told, you know, at that get perpetuated at conferences and, uh, you know, it’s, it’s, it’s detrimental. You know, it’s, I mean, and the, I, I, it’s, it’s valuable for folks to know there is science. It’s, it’s not all, it’s not all, uh, tales from the past and, and anecdotes. All right, all right. I’d like to leave it there if that’s OK. That sounds great. Is there anything itching? Is there anything that like a tip of your tongue that we got close to, but I didn’t know enough to ask about? No, I appreciate the opportunity to share. It’s always fun to have these conversations. OK, my pleasure. Absolutely. Russell James, chaired professor in the Department of Personal Financial Planning at Texas Tech University. You’ll find Russell on LinkedIn. Thank you for, for debunking myths, for breaking new ground, for the quantitative. Evaluation of, uh, of, of fundraising and, and, and what, what it takes for successful outcomes. And Tony, let me say I share all my stuff for free. Somebody connects with me on LinkedIn. I send them links to all my books for free, videos, slide sets, academic journal articles, all of that. Uh, some of that’s on my website, encourage generosity.com, uh, but share all my stuff for free. It doesn’t do any good if it sits on the shelf here at the university. It needs to get out to the people that are actually making a difference in the world. All right. Encourage generosity.com. That’s me. Thank you very much, Russell. Real pleasure. Thanks. Thank you. Next week, there will definitely be a show, guaranteed. If you missed any part of this week’s show, I beseech you, find it at Tony Martignetti.com. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your associate producer, Kate Martinetti. The show’s social media is by Susan Chavez. Mark Silverman is our web guy, and this music is by Scott Stein. Thank you for that affirmation, Scotty. Be with us next week for nonprofit radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. Go out and be great. There’s one line I have to redo um because I said Heliobacter instead of Helicobacter.

Nonprofit Radio for October 5, 2026: Easy Fundraising & Friendmaking for Board Members

 

Gail Perry: Easy Fundraising & Friendmaking for Board Members

That’s Gail Perry’s new book, working to overcome the bad reputation foisted on fundraising by many board members. She’s clear on the four fundraising roles your members can play, and only one means asking for gifts. She also emphasizes the importance of solid stewardship, and how easy it can be done, along with how your board and staff can best divide the fundraising work. Gail is the founder of Gail Perry Group.

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Welcome to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. I’m your aptly named host, and I’m the pod father of your favorite hebdominal podcast. Oh, I’m glad you’re with us. I’d be stricken with scorbutic gingivitis if you inflamed me with the idea that you missed this week’s show. Here’s our associate producer, Kate, to introduce it. Hey Tony, here’s the intro. Easy fundraising and friend making for board members. That’s Gayle Perry’s new book, Working to overcome the bad reputation foisted on fundraising by many board members. She’s clear on the 4 fundraising roles your members can play, and only 1 means asking for gifts. She also emphasizes the importance of solid stewardship and how easy it can be done, along with how your board and staff can best divide the fundraising work. Gail is the founder of Gail Perry Group. On Tony’s take too. Saying thanks to the people who don’t hear it much. Here is easy fundraising and friend making for board members. It’s a genuine pleasure to welcome back. Gail Perry. Gayle is founder of the Gail Perry Group, a national philanthropic consulting firm. She’s spent over 30 years teaching board members and nonprofit leaders how to raise money without the fear and awkwardness most people associate with fundraising. She’s the author of the brand new book, Easy Fundraising and Friend-making for Board members. And her core idea is a simple one. Make friends first, ask later. Gail Perry, welcome back. After many years to nonprofit radio. It’s great to see you. Oh, Tony, great to be here too. Thank you so much. My pleasure. Congratulations on the brand new book. Oh wow, yeah. I, I, I know what, I know what goes into it, so I, I, you’ve been working very, very hard. I know. Congratulations. Thank you. It launched yesterday, so. Um, hooray. Absolutely outstanding. Um, let, let’s, let’s go into it. So the, the title distinguishes between fundraising and friendmaking. I, I think that’s pretty clear, but you’re the author. Why don’t you distinguish between fundraising and friendmaking, please? Well, here’s the thing, uh, most board members think that fundraising equals one activity, asking for money. And so if, if the, if the tagline and the motto is make friends first, ask later, which is of course relational fundraising, um, we, we get board members to back off of thinking about the ask all the time and instead focus on, um, the donor relationship and there are many, many ways board members can support fundraising without directly having to ask. So it’s, um, it’s an interesting adventure because I’ve been working with. Board members on these topics for, you know, over maybe 15 years. Well, your first book, your first book was 20 years ago, right? Fired Up. We, I had that, that may be, I don’t know if that was the last time. Well, you were on to talk about your book, but it wasn’t 20 years ago because I didn’t have the podcast 20 years ago. But your, your first book was Fired Up Fundraising. You’ve been, you’re focused, your, your newsletter is Fired Up Fundraising. You are focused on board member fundraising. Yeah, well, the company, we, we, you know, I’m a major gifts expert and, um, I have a lot of expertise in all the fundraising areas, but my sweet spot, my fun stuff is helping board members who are well-meaning community volunteers, you know, they, they really want to help, but they’re afraid of the ass. They think fundraising is asking and they throw up their hands. But I’ll tell you, Tony, um, I was writing this book and all my, all my friends serve on boards, you know, and, and they’re all saying, oh, I need this book. I need this book now. When can I get it? So people, people, there’s a need out there, uh, for something written directly for board members. There’s a lot of stuff written for nonprofit staff and for leaders. My first book was all about the staff and the leaders, but this is just regular old board members, very simple. This is how you can help. Let, let, let’s emphasize the simplicity, your, because your, your core message is make friends first, ask later. So we, we have, we have plenty of time together. We’re gonna go into details, but give us an overview of make friends first, ask later. Yeah, love that. Yeah, thank you. Well, the whole idea, you know, we have transactional fundraising, which is all about the money, and we have relationship fundraising, which is all about a relationship with the donor. And if we are all about the money with with um donors, they, uh, it’s not a very powerful ask and it sort of belittles the activity and it doesn’t make the donor feel very good either. Uh, but if you have a relational approach, a donor-centered approach for for one way to look at it. Is that the, um, you, you’re, you’re all about the whole person. Uh, tell me why you’re interested in the botanical garden. I didn’t know you were interested, you know, would you like to see a tour? Um, tell me, tell me, tell me what most interests you over here and I’ll help you learn more. So you get to know, you let the whole, the whole person, the whole donor, the heart, the mind. And the, and the body, um, come first before you ask them, would you like to know how you can help? We can’t be all about the money. It’s, it, it shoots, we shoot ourselves in the foot when we’re all about the money. People don’t like that. Yeah, uh, and, and, and the person, the, the person, their family. Tell me about your, your career. Oh, you’re retired. What did you retire from? You know, so many, uh, you know, there’s so many opportunities to get to know folks. And, and build that relationship and that’s what, that’s what you’re focused on relational versus transactional. Yeah, and you know, it’s a great, um, great insight for board members to have. They’re community volunteers. They come in, they may have a, a sales background, um, but some of them may have been trained in what they call consultative selling, which is what you act as a consultant to your potential, um. Um, client, um, and help them think through what they need. That’s real, and that’s a more sophisticated approach. I was trained by Xerox in that a long time ago, um, and, um, that’s really the same approach we take, uh, in this book, but I, I also want to emphasize, Tony, this slower approach to the ask, I want to slow down. Uh, when I, I started my career at Duke University, and, um, we had this, we had the saying that the more times you are in front of a donor before the ask, the bigger the gift. And also, I share when I, in my workshop for board members, I, I share that and they go, oh, wow, makes sense, makes sense. So, uh, they understand that it’s not intuitive. Because you think fundraising is asking, but, um, when they back off and look at the process, and, and you know, sometimes I, sometimes I tell them, remember when you were in junior high and you wanted to, um, invite a girl to the prom or you, um, or you had a. Crush on somebody and you wanted to see if they would walk to the walk to the store with you, you know. Oh God, this is gonna, this is gonna trigger me. I was terrible with girls and please, all right, go ahead and tell the story. I’ll, I’ll, I’ll calm myself. And so, yeah, we all remember middle school I was like, oh my God, but the thing is you might do a drive by their house. You might understand their habits. What is their schedule of walking to the store, and then you might use an intermediary to gently find out if they might like you or not, you know. So, I, I mean, people, people really love that metaphor because they, they all can see themselves there tiptoeing up. You don’t just like walk up to this girl who barely knows you and blurt out the ask or the, or the guy. You, you take it slow. So, so it really is, once you understand, it’s very intuitive. All right, I, I don’t feel triggered, but, uh, the driving, driving by the house, uh, and, and sitting next to them on the school bus, that, uh, that, that, that’s kind of what, what comes to mind. Oh yeah, the drive-by man, it’s a big deal. Right. Um, so, this all leads to why there is such a, a, a, a negative feeling about fundraising by board members because they, they think it is that, it’s that one, it’s that one activity. I gotta ask, uh, and I’m gonna have to ask my friends, and then they’re gonna ask me. And so what’s the point? We’re all giving to the same. Why don’t I just give, why don’t I just give myself to the organization because they’re gonna ask me to give to their organization. You know, that’s, this is how we get that, that negative perception by board members because it’s a, it’s a, it’s a basic misunderstanding. Yeah, it is because, um, uh, that’s a transactional asks. It’s all about the money. It’s not going to, um, help you create a donor that feels devoted to your cause, that feels like a stakeholder, that feels like they are one with you and supporting your mission. They are a support. It’s the difference between when you make a gift, will you be a supporter. And so we, you know, in fundraising these days, we’re talking a lot about donor identity and I identify myself as a supporter of WUNC radio. I am a supporter of my favorite blood, um, food bank, 3 different food banks, you know, my husband and I are. So, so when you get to the, when you help people personally identify with the cause, um, they will stick with you and they will give more. And that’s the essence of friend-making, Tony. That’s what friendmaking is all about. It’s, it’s being all about the whole person. Let’s make friends, you know, let’s bring people into the organization and help them, um, discover what really turns them on. And, and, and I, I will say, you know, people are smart and they all have strong interests and, and not everybody wants to be interested or not, not everybody is actually interested in your cause, but the people that who are in your network would love to learn more. You know, I was at a neighborhood party recently. I serve on the University of North Carolina Botanical Garden Board, and of course, I chair the development committee, you know, uh, and the gala, but, um, the, um, uh, the, we do plant, we do research and, um, all, we’re a land trust, we do all sorts of kind of wonderful things, uh, in the ecology and conservation area. And so there I was at this neighborhood party and I mentioned the garden and this lady says, Oh, the botanical garden. Oh, you on the board? You know, she expressed strong interest. And so, and so I, I managed to blather a little bit. Yeah, you know, the garden, we, we’re, um, we’re focusing on plant conservation for the Southeast and it’s just so important in this, um, warming planet. Right now, the ecology and conservation, she said, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, and so my next step is to invite her over. Yeah, people have, you’re right, of course, people have passions and part of what we’re exploring is, you know, how passionate are you about our cause and, and what, you know, how can we bring you closer to it if you are passionate enough. I know, I, you know, you and I are both in. Carolina, of course, uh, uh, you’re in, you’re in Chapel Hill. Chapel Hill. I got my baby blue sweater on, right? Yeah, you support, uh, WUNC Public Radio. Uh, I am in Emerald Isle on the coast. I support, uh, PRE Public Radio East in, uh, out of New Bern. I listen to that one too sometimes. OK. Oh, good. OK, I’m from the eastern part of the state. You’re from North Carolina originally, yeah, from the coast, yeah. Where, where on the coast? Um, Bertie County near Edenton. Edenton, where’s, where’s that in relation to Wilmington, or uh, it’s north, it’s further north than the coast. It’s the inland, you know, we have the Outer Banks and the Inner Banks. Edenton was the former colonial capital of North Carolina, and it, um, um, it’s on the mouth of the Albemarle Sound. OK. All right, so that’s even north of where I am in Emerald Isle. Oh yeah, yeah, that’s, that’s, that’s further north on the coast going toward Tidewater, Virginia. Yeah, OK, right, right, very far north. Yeah, I have a tidewater accent. You’re a, well, OK. Well, you have a North Carolina accent. You’re, you’re, you’re born and raised in North Carolina. I’ve only been here 1010 years. Well, welcome. We, we claim you as the Tar Heel. Oh, thank you. I, well, let’s not get carried away as the Tar Heel. I don’t know, but, but, uh, I know you’re, I know you’re UNC. I, I might be more NC State, but that’s OK. Um, so, all right, so you’ve got 4 roles. You’ve got 4 roles for, uh, board member. As fundraisers, as ambassador, influencer, occasional asker, I like that occasional asker and steward. So let’s, let’s talk through, please. Could you, uh, let’s start acquainting folks with, uh, what’s, what’s an ambassador’s role? Well, the ambassadors of the board do two things. They spread the word wherever they go, which means they learn their talking points and how to talk to donors, and they also invite people in. They’re the hosts, you know, they might host tours, they might host coffees or porch parties. They, um, they just spread good cheer and invite people to get to know more about the, the organization. So they deal with groups of people and the influencers deal one on one. Um, they, um, they can work privately behind the scenes with specific donors, funders, corporations, maybe government officials, um, because they have a particular connection. And they may not want to be in front of this funder, but they can advise you, um, in a, in a, in an approach to this particular funding source that is appropriately timed, that understands the sensitivities of the situation and who the and who may influence this person. There may be gatekeepers, there may be. Uh, I mean, you know, it, it’s, it’s a lot of nuance, nuance, um, when it comes to, um, approaching and developing a relationship with a significant potential, right. So, OK, so we have, yeah, so we have the, um, uh, we have the ambassador, we have the influencer. How do we, before we carry on with the other two, how do we Suss out who’s best in, in, in which of these roles and who’s gonna, because we want our board members to be comfortable. That’s and sometimes board members can play two roles. OK. How do we, how do we figure out what, what, where, where they’d be best suited? Uh, well, the rule of thumb is you meet privately with each board member. And just chat with them about their interest and who they know. They’re not going to reveal who they know in a large meeting, but they will probably in a private conversation with you and share a lot of very helpful information. You know, I have a, a girlfriend who’s an heiress, and she, you know, she, we like to do things together, but I don’t, I’m, I don’t want to like approach her. I could approach her and say, would you be interested in learning more about the botanical garden? Um, or I can do that. I can ask her if she’s interested or not, but I’m not gonna directly approach. I can coach other people. You know, I can easily coach other people. You have a friend who’s an heiress. Wow, I don’t know any heiresses. Well, you know, or heirs. I don’t know heirs or heiresses. She lucked up. What can I say? She lucked up. She, she lucked up. That is that she lucked up? Yeah, it’s a Southern phrase. Yeah, I don’t know. lucked out. I would say lucked, she lucked out. You say lucked up? Yeah. All right. I’ve heard married up. But, uh, I haven’t heard lucked up. Married up is more of a commitment than luck up. You better watch it. I have a lot of Southern colloquial phrases. Well, I’m gonna call them out because, uh, uh, everybody is not from the South, so I, I, I need to make sure that everybody understands what we’re, OK. Hey, Tony, Tony, one time, one time, you know, I’ve done a. A lot of board workshops in my career and the Actuarial Society of North Carolina, I mean of of of the US Actuarial Society, yeah, uh, and hired me and brought me in for a, a day-long workshop. They, the, the, the board members really wanted to know how to raise money. They were very motivated. And so here I am in the Midwest talking to these very people who are very precise, you know, actuaries, and, um, I’m using, I’m using y’all. OK, because I’m gonna be myself, right? And, uh, the, there, there was one of the guys who did a chart of how many times I said y’all, he called, that’s 3 times during the course of the day he was keeping, he was keeping a little hash marks. All right, I’m not that harsh. I’m not, well, he’s an actuary. He’s a counter. Oh, it was funny. I just thought it was hilarious. He’s a num numerical, uh, yeah, he’s a numbers person. All right, hash mark. All right. I’m not, I don’t have any hash marks. I’m not keeping track. Let me go, let me go back to finding out who should be an ambassador versus an influencer. We like to know, um, um, we like to meet, ideally you meet with people one on one, and you, and you see if you can do that at least annually, right? You meet each board member at least annually for their, for a conversation. Yeah, but some organizations don’t want the development directors or fundraising people talking to their board, you know. All fundraising, they’re all different. So hopefully you can meet with board members and chat with them about what, how they’re interested in supporting fundraising or, or this, this, this annual meeting may be with the CEO. This may be a CEO board member meeting. Yeah, OK, yeah, yeah, yeah, um, so, um, my dog is barking in the background. I hope it’s, can you hear it? I love animals. No, no, it’s. My husband’s gone, so the dog is wrapping away over there. Um, but, um, so, so, um, sometimes also when I’m doing a board workshop, I will, uh, I’ll describe these roles and we’ll talk about them all. And I’ll, I’ll put the board member, I like to do small group conversations, uh, on a topic like they’re 5 people to a table, 5 board members to a table, and I force them to talk about some of these fundraising topics. It’s really powerful, you know, and, and I’ll say, well, can y’all, can each table, um, discuss these two. Roles and see, see how, how it feels to you to take on one of these roles. And so people could talk to each other. Well, you know, I think maybe I could do this. I have found doing all the, all these workshops I’ve done over the years, Tony, is that especially with board member volunteers that the more I can get them to talk. The more they take ownership of and, and the more insights they develop and they, it lands, it lands so much differently, you know, you can’t just lecture to people, adults will turn you off. So getting them to think and have discussions is very powerful. It’s time for Tony’s take 2. Thank you, Kate. I’m thinking about Saying thanks to people who don’t hear thanks very much. Uh, I’ve been traveling a lot recently, both for client work and also for my book, and there’s a good bit more travel coming up the rest of this year. And so when you’re on the go, you know, it’s easy to forget, I think, simple courtesies. So I’m trying to be more conscious of saying thanks, uh, showing gratitude in very ordinary situations. Uh, to people who don’t hear thanks very much like. Uh, bathroom attendants in airports. I mean, everybody’s just in and out of the bathroom, you’re right? You either, you either got to your destination and you gotta get in your Uber or you gotta get to a meeting, or you’re connecting and you gotta get to your flight, or you’re just, you’re arriving at the airport and you gotta get to your flight. Nobody, nobody thinks of these folks. Uh, but when the bathroom is great, when the bathroom is clean, We’re grateful, right? And when it’s not, we’re disappointed and upset. So, I think just thanks for those folks. Um, I’m also thinking about people who prepare the, uh, the breakfast. At hotels, I stay at a lot of Marriotts. Actually, I stay only at Marriotts. And, uh, you know, breakfast is included. So yeah, of course, you’re entitled to the breakfast, but I like to poke my head in the kitchen and, uh, and thank the folks who are in there for breakfast or when they come out to replenish the scrambled eggs, uh, or they cut up, uh, strawberries. You know, I like to say, I like to say thank you. I’m trying to be more conscious of this. And at home. Um, I’ve, I’ve gotten very good at saying thank you to the garbage men. They come 3 times a week. Monday and Friday is garbage, and Wednesday is recycling. I, I live alone, so I’m hardly contributing. But when I do, when I put my Garbage can out and they pick it up. I make a point to go out and, and say thank you. So. I don’t know, I, I just, I think we should be more conscious of. Showing our gratitude in very ordinary routine places. And that’s Tony’s take 2. Kate. I think last time you had, you said something like this on Tony’s Take Two, I brought up crossing guards. This time I’m going to bring up school janitors, teachers, and security. I mean, I’m in the classroom now twice a week, so I’m also trying to like build relationships with the people that I’m now working with. Um, But they, they don’t get any recognition. Janitors, teachers. Uh, and security, security, yes, yeah, yeah. Very good, yeah, cuz you’re um, you’re doing your student teaching now on your way to your degree in education. Um, yeah, it’s, it’s, it’s good to thank folks like that. Just, even if it’s not necessarily a thank you, although thank you is outstanding, I think, just a hello, hello. What’s your name? You know, what’s your name? I see, I see you every day at the, at the entrance, Mr. or Ms. security person. What’s your name? Yes. He’s got you sorry. We’ve got booco butt loads more time. Here’s the rest of easy fundraising and friend making for board members with Gay Perry. Let’s go to the occasional asker. What, what’s this person’s responsibility. Sounds pretty clear, but yeah, well, the thing is, is that give us the details. Reason, reason we say occasional is that we don’t want, um, um, board members to just willy-nilly be asking all over the place. Uh, an ask needs to be planned. And it means, needs to be timed correctly, uh, board, uh, uh, and one of our rules in fundraising never surprise a donor with an ask. And so, uh, the occasional asker participates with the staff team or if there’s no staff with, um, with the, they, um, they wear a staff hat as well, like, is this person ready to have a conversation, you know, we teach a lot about permission. Say to the donor, would you like to have this conversation? Would you like to learn more? May we come see you? Uh, so, um, I think, uh, the occasional asker role helps me explain to board members how it’s supposed to be done, you know, strategically, strategically, yes, it’s a good word, strategically, and I thoughtfully, relationship-wise, where is this person on the, on our relationship spectrum versus this other person, and you know, ready, the other not ready. I’ll say to the board members, I’ll say, um. Have you ever been asked before? No, I’ll say, what happens if you ask a donor before they’re ready and everybody in the room goes, oh yeah, that is not a good idea, you know, and they’ve had these experiences too. So it, it is possible to help board members understand this stuff, but it’s not, but they don’t walk into the board role understanding how it all needs to work. No, this is your responsibility to help them understand. Yeah, I have fun with this. I enjoy doing this. And the 4th role is steward. Oh, yes, steward. Steward is a thank you committee of the board, you know, and the stewards are the people who adopt donor retention as, um, as something they’re going to help the staff tackle. Uh, you know, uh, the whole idea that an organization may be losing half of its donors every year or more or more, yeah, 70, 75%, yeah, maybe losing 1st, 1st time donors lost. Oh, the first time donors, yeah, they are very unlikely to stick. And the larger donors do send their donor retentions higher, but just explaining, helping board members understand the huge opportunities there are in donor retention and, and it’s the easiest ask in the world because these people are already donors right now. Let’s just get them to renew their gift and remain supporters. You know, so, um, so, so there’s so many ways to thank donors and I was talking about this at a little party last night, you know, because, uh, uh, there were some people who are interested in, in tips for my book. I said, well, let me give you a tip about this donor retention stuff. And the board, you know, the data says that when board members make thank you phone calls, uh, the donors will keep giving and the gifts will go up. Keep giving and the gifts and it’s such a simple call to make. All you’re doing is calling and saying thank you. If, if you don’t get the person, you leave a sincere, heartfelt voicemail message with a phone number, of course, so they can call back. Um, those are so simple. You’re just saying thank you. That’s it. Thank you. Why do you love us? Thank you for loving us. Why do you, you know, if you can engage them in a conversation, great, but they’re, they’re, they’re ideal for board members. Yeah. Yeah, and so these are such easy roles, you know, the ambassadors are like the social committee and, you know, the stewards of the thank you committee and, and, um, and, and nurturing those relationships at the beginning. And after, and after the first gift, you know, helps, uh, create, create donors that are gonna stick with you in the long run, this is how you build a culture of philanthropy too, is, um, is helping board members understand all these different roles and helping them get enthusiastic about how they can help because these are things that everybody can do. I’ve heard of the stewardship calls being a part of a board meeting. So, you know, maybe quarterly, the last half hour of the board meeting is, here’s the list. We’re all gonna call, we’re all going to call 6 people. Let, let’s, and if you don’t get them, you leave a sincere message, but let’s, let’s all do this, uh, as, as. Last part of a board meeting occasionally. And you know that helps, um, board members understand the whole fundraising process when they do that. It’s a wonderful way to to ease them in slowly into helping support fundraising and let me tell you, can I tell you a story? One of our stories, we love stories, yeah, one of our clients, um, this was a staff member who was doing some thank you phone calls and she just chose this gentleman who was routinely giving, um, $1000 a year, every year, regularly, $10,000 and so she called him and she had taken our trainings and she knew the questions to ask him like, I’d love to know how you came to be a donor. You know, and the guy started talking and, and she, they were talking about the mission and what his background was in this work and how he felt about it and he talked and talked. And then he, um, he, he said, you know, I’m so, um, committed to this cause. I want to make a $100,000 gift. Wow, boom, boom without an ask, without an ask, you know, so, um, that, that’s fantastic from a $1000 donor to a $100,000 donor without an ask, yeah, without, without asking, just having a conversation, yeah, um, and, and, um, and somebody was writing to me recently because I always ask people to try these ideas and sit, let me know how they’re doing. One person wrote and she said, you know, I’ve been having these donor meetings and when I asked one person why, how they came to be a donor, she opened up like a flower. Yeah. Isn’t that wonderful? Yeah, that’s sweet. Yeah, people, you know, yeah, people who are invested in our work, yeah, you know, it’s special to them to get a call from a board member or in that case, you, the story you just told, that was a staff member. But, but to just to get a call or a handwritten note. I’m a big supporter of handwritten notes. A handwritten note from the CEO or a handwritten note from a board member. You know, these, these things are, they’re such easy, easy, but enormously valuable touch points that, you know, we overlook them because we think, oh, what’s a phone call? But it’s a phone call of thanks. That’s it. It’s a little bit, it’s, you took 5 minutes to write a hand note that nobody does. So it’s going to stand out because it’s going to come. The little card is going to come, it’s going to be hand addressed. It’s going to stand out. Yeah, it’s going to stand out and And it, um, and the money available in donor retention is so great. Right now, we’re looking at the year-end fundraising for 2026 and I tell everybody, all my workshops and talks, I say, um, uh, add up every, add up the money. Um, well, add up all the donors who have given so far this year, and then the donors who have not yet given, who have not yet renewed their gift this year, and look, look at how much money is available to this organization if you do a good job between now and the end of the year. Start your year-end campaign with a thankathon. You know, start it with a thankathon. Very good, yeah, yeah. You make the point that, uh, the first gift is never the largest gift. Absolutely. And I think that plays obviously into the stewardship we’re talking about, but, you know, say, say some more about that. Well, I guess the correct way to do it is the first gift is hopefully never the largest gift. OK, hopefully, because, um, a lot of our research on donors shows that. Um, when donor donors make a first gift, they’re sort of testing out the organization. You know, do I like these people? Um, do they, do they know that I’m giving and I, am I anonymous? You know, I don’t want, I personally, I don’t want to be an anonymous donor. If I’m a monthly donor to at least 10 organizations, I, I hope they know I’m a monthly donor. So, so that, uh, looking at every donor with the potential that they have a long-term future with your organization also helps change your perspective a lot. And as you know, that the people who have been giving to your organization regularly, even small amounts, you know, maybe 10 years straight or 20 years straight, you’re in their will. You’re the plan giving expert, isn’t that right? I know a thing or two about planned giving. Yeah, I know a little bit, but the people who are most likely, most likely to make planned gifts. Yeah, those long-term loyal committed donors. Yep, yep, they don’t have to be major donors. They certainly can be, but they don’t even have to be major donors. Just, it’s that long-term loyal support. Those are your best planned giving prospects. You’re right. You’re right. And people who feel committed. Yeah, they are, because they’ve been giving to you for decades. I mean, it’s not unusual to see someone who’s given 2025, maybe 30 years, and these are not necessarily large gifts, but it’s the consistency. They, they, they love you so much, they think about you at least once a year. Maybe, maybe you see 20 years of giving and 25 or 28 gifts, because some years it’s multiple gifts. And again, not necessarily large gifts, but, but that kind of commitment. Um, you, uh, you have some thoughts about boards investing in planned giving. Oh yeah, I have thoughts about board members investing in fundraising too. I have all chapter. On, um, on strategic decisions that board members make. Because, ah. Over and over and over, board members look at the cost of fundraising as an expense. It’s just like money down the tube. Can we cut this expense? Can we cut this expense? But the fact is, the money you spend on fundraising is an investment because it pays for itself and, and it returns. And so the more, the more you invest in, I mean, the data, data is all over the place. The more you invest in fundraising, the more money you will raise. Uh, so I, I tell sometimes when I’m working with this really small organization that’s struggling with um building infrastructure. Um, I say to them, you know, here you are, you have $1 and you’re trying to feed hungry children or put coats on them or cure disease. You, you know, you, you really need to spend that whole $1 on your program, but if you don’t take part of that, um, that $1 and spend it on your organization, you will never grow. You will be on the hamsterswheel forever and you’ll stay stuck and so people go, oh, OK, whether they, whether they bring that through when it comes time to do budgeting is another story. Another point you make is that major gifts often come from folks you, you already know. They come from insiders. These folks just haven’t been cultivated and stewarded for becoming the next major donor. Yeah, they have not been cultivated at all. In fact, Penelope Burke’s great research, um, she’s, she’s no longer, um, involved with fundraising, but she, she would say that you, every organization has got major gift prospects, major gift donors in its database, but unfortunately they’re small donors and they’re not being treated. Like they have major potential and so you’ve got sleepers inside your donor database. That’s why you have to treat everybody with warmth and love and and help them feel appreciation. I want to mention the word feel, uh, the more and more, the longer I’ve been in fundraising and read the research through the years, it’s how people feel that is so important, you know, people want to, um, feel connected, they want to feel appreciated, they want to feel passionate. They want to feel good about their gifts, uh, and, and, and, uh, when we, when we, when we do a thank you note full of a gift receipt, which may, we may need to do, but you make it transactional, you, you miss the magnificence and the joy and the passion of somebody’s support for your work. Well, you can send the gift receipt, but you can also send a sincere thank you note or, or a phone call. Well, both, um, maybe both even, um, uh, an informal call, and then a formal thank you note, as well as the gift receipt. You know, that, that IRS required document for every gift over $250. It’s not one or the other, right? We can do it all. I know, and I, I, I’ve worked with some organizations that were still doing this thing called an annual meeting. Because that was required in the bylaws. Very boring, right? Very boring. Nobody wants to come. But if you turned your annual meeting into an annual donor appreciation event and made it into a party, the donors would show up. What’s, what’s the annual meeting? that’s some bylaws require. An annual meeting of the board you’re talking about no, of, of, of, of members. So, if it’s a, if it’s a a specific type of agency, if it’s a membership organization, maybe you know, and, and museums and botanical gardens and, uh, the certain types are, are usually organized according to membership, which is a real mess if you ask me, but that’s not my topic today. No, yeah, I, I understand. All right, um, something we’ve, we’ve kind of talked around, but let, let’s, let’s get into detail about the Dividing up the roles, the fundraising roles between the board. We, we identified 4 roles for the board, but what’s the, the, you know, what’s the division between the board and the staff? How do you see the staff supporting the board in those 4 roles? Let’s talk about that relationship and, and, you know, that, that can be a difficult relation that can be a difficult issue because Um, we see more and more that board members don’t understand the line between, um, their role and the staff’s role. Uh, people join boards to give their opinion and so many board members are not going to particularly give opinions about the program area, um, but they’re certainly going to give their opinions about, um, fundraising. So there I’m following somebody on substack right now who talks a lot about board members who overstep, uh, and try to give fundraising advice to the staff team. So I just want to touch on this as, as a perennial issue in many organizations that board members are not educated. And even if you educate them, they feel like they are empowered to provide input into fundraising strategy itself. Uh, so I do make those points gently in the book since this is written 4 board members, but also, um, the role of staff is to be the quarterbacks of all these donor relationships, um, and I have seen volunteers get really enthusiastic about a relationship and then drop the ball. And or the the the board member may participate in some way and then nothing else happens because they don’t do the follow up. So staff is the glue to track the donor relationships, to be sure that activity is happening with important donors. And if the board member volunteers to do something and they don’t do it, then the staff figures out another way for the board, for the donor to feel, feel, feel good about the organization. So staff quarterback, staff does the follow-up. Staff sets up ask meetings, Staff briefs board members, helps choose, um, it helps develop strategy for big asks in collaboration with influencers and occasional askers. I see the um the, the, the problem that you were describing, board members overstepping and, you know, getting into fundraising strategy. That’s, that’s the CEO’s responsibility to set, set those boundaries and enforce. The boundaries and say, you know, that, that’s really, that’s really a staff role. What, what, what, what we need you to bring for us is either ambassador, influencer, occasional asker or steward, you know, but, and, and we want your help in, in those respects, but, you know, uh, we, we, we can’t take direction from all, all the board members. That’s, that’s, that’s really my role and the, and our development director’s role, if there is one. So you have to delicately enforce those, those boundaries. I would say that a lot of the executive directors, um, um, are nervous about establishing that kind of boundary. Yeah, but that’s when you get overreaching. If you don’t enforce, I mean, it’s the same as, uh, I don’t know, maybe this is not a, a, a very fair analogy, but, uh, and I’m, and I’m the guy who doesn’t even have children. But to me, it’s like, it’s, it’s similar to enforcing boundaries around children. If you, if you don’t enforce them, they’re going to be tested. And adults are not that much different. You’re right. But, but if you, if you do step in, most adults will, will learn from a, a, a gentle admonition. But, uh, too, but I, I serve on the botanical garden board. And I chair the development committee, and we’ve got some new board members who are beating, beating certain topics to death that they think need to happen. Yeah, I can’t, I try to explain it to them, but I’m just a fellow board member. It sounds like they may have come on the board with an agenda that, that they want to see, you know, whatever. They have this idea, and it’s such a great idea, and I don’t understand why the staff can’t implement this idea. You know, when you have that, I mean, that’s part of the landscape of nonprofit boards is to have people like that. And hopefully you have a solid, either a solid board chair or a solid executive director that understands that yellow line. That you don’t go outside the yellow line of board roles, and I will say too that, um, people don’t talk about board roles. People don’t, the board members don’t know what’s expected of them because so many boards are different. And so, um, just a, just a frank discussion of the board roles and responsibilities rarely happens. They might sign a document that this is what I’m supposed to do, but, uh, it’s not necessarily enforced and it’s not discussed. Yeah, not right, not enforced, not discussed. We, we avoid difficult conversations, but they end up becoming 10 times more difficult if, because the problem festers. And, and now we’re, and now we’re having to manage, uh, a problem maybe between a, a board member and, and some staff because the board member is overreaching. So now it’s becoming an employee, team member problem. We’ve got to, you know, you, you, you can’t shrink away from these, these difficult conversations. That’s why you’re the CEO. That’s why you’re the board chair. And, and, and Tony, the, the real challenge is once you get a board operating correctly, 1/3 of them leave and you have a whole new group of. Yeah, well, well, you, yeah, but you have the 2/3 that can help socialize the new 1/3 to the, to the right way of doing things and, and the, and the board’s appropriate role. Yeah. Let’s, um, I like, excuse me, I love, um, you know, like actionable tips, and you have a bunch of them, you have a bunch of them in the book. Um, what, what’s something, if we have a fearful board member, what’s something we could ask them to do in the next week or so, fearful around fundraising? Oh, do thank you calls and give them a script and make it fun, you know, I suggest a thankathon is bring pizza in, but make people come together. People, people, I mean, after the pandemic, people are so used to Zoom, which, um, which does not create any sense of collaboration. It, it, it really hamstrings a lot of groups meeting on Zoom all the time. So I think helping people, you got to train people a little bit about why, why these thank yous are so important. What are we doing? donor retention. We want donors to feel good about being a supporter of our organization. Yeah, there’s that feeling, feeling again. How do you feel about the organization? How do you feel it treats you? Yeah. Yeah. So that’s, that’s a great way to deal with a fearful boy. Let me, let me another story. OK, this is a thankathon story. So working with this group and I said, thankathon, and they said, OK, we’re gonna have a thank, we’re gonna launch our year-end campaign with a thankathon. And there was, it was a medical facility and there was this older gentleman trustee. And he was very nervous about this whole thinking thing. He just was very, he was reluctant, but he was a good sport and he showed up for this night, pizza and everything, you know, camaraderie is always helpful too. And, um, so he made a couple of phone calls and one call he made, this is a true story now, one call he made was to another gentleman who had had a great experience at the hospital and the two men talked maybe 15 minutes. About the hospital and all of these things. Two weeks later, the person who called, got the thank you call, sent in a $10,000 gift. And said, I just enjoyed my conversation so much. You know, and the board member who was fearful, so I was so pleased. He said, maybe this stuff is not so bad after all. So, you know, Tony, we, we, we belittle, we, we make fundraising this awful thing down in the gutter. We make ourselves small when it’s all about money. And then if you think about high up on the hill, we’re changing the world, white light, making people happy, making people feel their passion, you know, um, doing good for the world. And it, and it’s, it’s the same activity is, is your point of view. Think It is, your, your point of view is, is it’s all in the mind. Yeah. And, and it’s also, it, pardon me? It’s how you approach it. which, which is driven by how you think about it, and that’s where the book comes in because board members are thinking. Incorrectly about what, what fundraising is as a board member. They’re, they’re thinking, you know, it’s where you started. They’re, they’re thinking I have to ask a bunch of strangers or my friends for money, and I don’t want to do it. And that’s, well, that’s, that’s the value of your work, that’s the value of the book. And that’s been my life’s work really with all these board members. You know, my motto is when in doubt, throw a party. And it always makes them laugh, but you know, I do that deliberately because lighten things up. And I say to the board members, I say, listen, if you, if you can have fun doing what you’re doing, if you can have fun changing the world, if you have a sense of passion and camaraderie and enjoyment, what’s gonna happen? You’re gonna bring more people in who wanna hang with you. You’re gonna attract more attention in the community because people are gonna be talking about it. You’re, you’re gonna raise more money. And change the world faster if you, if you can level up that level of enthusiasm and enjoyment. We call it fellowship. You know, I enjoy hanging out with people I know. It’s fun. So, um, I do think that if we let board members get help, foster board members, um, personal relationships, it’s, um, it’s very important to help for board members to know each other because they will enjoy each other, getting to know each other. The book is Easy fundraising and Friend Making for board members. Gayle, where is it available? It’s available on Amazon and Goodreads, and I have a Kindle, a hardcover, and a soft, softcover paperback, and it went on sale yesterday and we achieved number one bestseller status in a couple of categories too, Tony. And, um, I’m so excited to because my goal, uh, my goal is really to get this into the hands of as many board members as possible and, and help them change the world. That’s my goal. Gail Perry. Founder, outstanding, founder of the Gail Perry Group. Are you, uh, are you active on LinkedIn, Gail Perry? Uh, very much LinkedIn. You are very much active on LinkedIn. All right, so folks can connect with you there. I know we’re, all right, I know we are connected. All right. And if y’all, if anybody listening is interested in some board workshops, I’m happy to chat with you about how to approach those. Thank you very much, Gail. It’s great to see you. Congratulations again. Congratulations again on the book. Thank you, Tony. Congratulations on yours too. Thank you. Okey dokey. Bye. Next week, hiring your development team with Sarah Olivieri. If you missed any part of this week’s show, I beseech you, find it at Tony Martignetti.com. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your associate producer, Kate Martinetti. The show’s social media is by Susan Chavez. Mark Silverman is our web guy, and this music is by Scott Stein. Thank you for that affirmation, Scotty. Be with us next week for nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. Go out and be great.

Nonprofit Radio for September 28, 2026: Your Board’s Role In Talent Management

 

Allison Wyatt: Your Board’s Role In Talent Management

With a strong CEO/board relationship, your board plays a valuable role in talent decisions that impact your culture, equity and sustainability. Likewise with executive compensation and evaluation, developing a leadership pipeline and succession planning. And what does that strong CEO/board relationship look like? Allison Wyatt, CEO of Edgility Talent Partners, shares her expertise.

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Board relations. Fundraising. Volunteer management. Prospect research. Legal compliance. Accounting. Finance. Investments. Donor relations. Public relations. Marketing. Technology. Social media.

Every nonprofit struggles with these issues. Big nonprofits hire experts. The other 95% listen to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Trusted experts and leading thinkers join me each week to tackle the tough issues. If you have big dreams but a small budget, you have a home at Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio.
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Welcome to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. I’m your aptly named host, and I’m the pod father of your favorite hebdominal podcast. Oh, I’m glad you’re with us. I’d be stricken with scorbutic gingivitis if you inflamed me with the idea that you missed this week’s show. Here’s our associate producer, Kate, to introduce it. Hey Tony, here’s the intro. Easy fundraising and friend making for board members. That’s Gayle Perry’s new book, Working to overcome the bad reputation foisted on fundraising by many board members. She’s clear on the 4 fundraising roles your members can play, and only 1 means asking for gifts. She also emphasizes the importance of solid stewardship and how easy it can be done, along with how your board and staff can best divide the fundraising work. Gail is the founder of Gail Perry Group. On Tony’s take too. Saying thanks to the people who don’t hear it much. Here is easy fundraising and friend making for board members. It’s a genuine pleasure to welcome back. Gail Perry. Gayle is founder of the Gail Perry Group, a national philanthropic consulting firm. She’s spent over 30 years teaching board members and nonprofit leaders how to raise money without the fear and awkwardness most people associate with fundraising. She’s the author of the brand new book, Easy Fundraising and Friend-making for Board members. And her core idea is a simple one. Make friends first, ask later. Gail Perry, welcome back. After many years to nonprofit radio. It’s great to see you. Oh, Tony, great to be here too. Thank you so much. My pleasure. Congratulations on the brand new book. Oh wow, yeah. I, I, I know what, I know what goes into it, so I, I, you’ve been working very, very hard. I know. Congratulations. Thank you. It launched yesterday, so. Um, hooray. Absolutely outstanding. Um, let, let’s, let’s go into it. So the, the title distinguishes between fundraising and friendmaking. I, I think that’s pretty clear, but you’re the author. Why don’t you distinguish between fundraising and friendmaking, please? Well, here’s the thing, uh, most board members think that fundraising equals one activity, asking for money. And so if, if the, if the tagline and the motto is make friends first, ask later, which is of course relational fundraising, um, we, we get board members to back off of thinking about the ask all the time and instead focus on, um, the donor relationship and there are many, many ways board members can support fundraising without directly having to ask. So it’s, um, it’s an interesting adventure because I’ve been working with. Board members on these topics for, you know, over maybe 15 years. Well, your first book, your first book was 20 years ago, right? Fired Up. We, I had that, that may be, I don’t know if that was the last time. Well, you were on to talk about your book, but it wasn’t 20 years ago because I didn’t have the podcast 20 years ago. But your, your first book was Fired Up Fundraising. You’ve been, you’re focused, your, your newsletter is Fired Up Fundraising. You are focused on board member fundraising. Yeah, well, the company, we, we, you know, I’m a major gifts expert and, um, I have a lot of expertise in all the fundraising areas, but my sweet spot, my fun stuff is helping board members who are well-meaning community volunteers, you know, they, they really want to help, but they’re afraid of the ass. They think fundraising is asking and they throw up their hands. But I’ll tell you, Tony, um, I was writing this book and all my, all my friends serve on boards, you know, and, and they’re all saying, oh, I need this book. I need this book now. When can I get it? So people, people, there’s a need out there, uh, for something written directly for board members. There’s a lot of stuff written for nonprofit staff and for leaders. My first book was all about the staff and the leaders, but this is just regular old board members, very simple. This is how you can help. Let, let, let’s emphasize the simplicity, your, because your, your core message is make friends first, ask later. So we, we have, we have plenty of time together. We’re gonna go into details, but give us an overview of make friends first, ask later. Yeah, love that. Yeah, thank you. Well, the whole idea, you know, we have transactional fundraising, which is all about the money, and we have relationship fundraising, which is all about a relationship with the donor. And if we are all about the money with with um donors, they, uh, it’s not a very powerful ask and it sort of belittles the activity and it doesn’t make the donor feel very good either. Uh, but if you have a relational approach, a donor-centered approach for for one way to look at it. Is that the, um, you, you’re, you’re all about the whole person. Uh, tell me why you’re interested in the botanical garden. I didn’t know you were interested, you know, would you like to see a tour? Um, tell me, tell me, tell me what most interests you over here and I’ll help you learn more. So you get to know, you let the whole, the whole person, the whole donor, the heart, the mind. And the, and the body, um, come first before you ask them, would you like to know how you can help? We can’t be all about the money. It’s, it, it shoots, we shoot ourselves in the foot when we’re all about the money. People don’t like that. Yeah, uh, and, and, and the person, the, the person, their family. Tell me about your, your career. Oh, you’re retired. What did you retire from? You know, so many, uh, you know, there’s so many opportunities to get to know folks. And, and build that relationship and that’s what, that’s what you’re focused on relational versus transactional. Yeah, and you know, it’s a great, um, great insight for board members to have. They’re community volunteers. They come in, they may have a, a sales background, um, but some of them may have been trained in what they call consultative selling, which is what you act as a consultant to your potential, um. Um, client, um, and help them think through what they need. That’s real, and that’s a more sophisticated approach. I was trained by Xerox in that a long time ago, um, and, um, that’s really the same approach we take, uh, in this book, but I, I also want to emphasize, Tony, this slower approach to the ask, I want to slow down. Uh, when I, I started my career at Duke University, and, um, we had this, we had the saying that the more times you are in front of a donor before the ask, the bigger the gift. And also, I share when I, in my workshop for board members, I, I share that and they go, oh, wow, makes sense, makes sense. So, uh, they understand that it’s not intuitive. Because you think fundraising is asking, but, um, when they back off and look at the process, and, and you know, sometimes I, sometimes I tell them, remember when you were in junior high and you wanted to, um, invite a girl to the prom or you, um, or you had a. Crush on somebody and you wanted to see if they would walk to the walk to the store with you, you know. Oh God, this is gonna, this is gonna trigger me. I was terrible with girls and please, all right, go ahead and tell the story. I’ll, I’ll, I’ll calm myself. And so, yeah, we all remember middle school I was like, oh my God, but the thing is you might do a drive by their house. You might understand their habits. What is their schedule of walking to the store, and then you might use an intermediary to gently find out if they might like you or not, you know. So, I, I mean, people, people really love that metaphor because they, they all can see themselves there tiptoeing up. You don’t just like walk up to this girl who barely knows you and blurt out the ask or the, or the guy. You, you take it slow. So, so it really is, once you understand, it’s very intuitive. All right, I, I don’t feel triggered, but, uh, the driving, driving by the house, uh, and, and sitting next to them on the school bus, that, uh, that, that, that’s kind of what, what comes to mind. Oh yeah, the drive-by man, it’s a big deal. Right. Um, so, this all leads to why there is such a, a, a, a negative feeling about fundraising by board members because they, they think it is that, it’s that one, it’s that one activity. I gotta ask, uh, and I’m gonna have to ask my friends, and then they’re gonna ask me. And so what’s the point? We’re all giving to the same. Why don’t I just give, why don’t I just give myself to the organization because they’re gonna ask me to give to their organization. You know, that’s, this is how we get that, that negative perception by board members because it’s a, it’s a, it’s a basic misunderstanding. Yeah, it is because, um, uh, that’s a transactional asks. It’s all about the money. It’s not going to, um, help you create a donor that feels devoted to your cause, that feels like a stakeholder, that feels like they are one with you and supporting your mission. They are a support. It’s the difference between when you make a gift, will you be a supporter. And so we, you know, in fundraising these days, we’re talking a lot about donor identity and I identify myself as a supporter of WUNC radio. I am a supporter of my favorite blood, um, food bank, 3 different food banks, you know, my husband and I are. So, so when you get to the, when you help people personally identify with the cause, um, they will stick with you and they will give more. And that’s the essence of friend-making, Tony. That’s what friendmaking is all about. It’s, it’s being all about the whole person. Let’s make friends, you know, let’s bring people into the organization and help them, um, discover what really turns them on. And, and, and I, I will say, you know, people are smart and they all have strong interests and, and not everybody wants to be interested or not, not everybody is actually interested in your cause, but the people that who are in your network would love to learn more. You know, I was at a neighborhood party recently. I serve on the University of North Carolina Botanical Garden Board, and of course, I chair the development committee, you know, uh, and the gala, but, um, the, um, uh, the, we do plant, we do research and, um, all, we’re a land trust, we do all sorts of kind of wonderful things, uh, in the ecology and conservation area. And so there I was at this neighborhood party and I mentioned the garden and this lady says, Oh, the botanical garden. Oh, you on the board? You know, she expressed strong interest. And so, and so I, I managed to blather a little bit. Yeah, you know, the garden, we, we’re, um, we’re focusing on plant conservation for the Southeast and it’s just so important in this, um, warming planet. Right now, the ecology and conservation, she said, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, and so my next step is to invite her over. Yeah, people have, you’re right, of course, people have passions and part of what we’re exploring is, you know, how passionate are you about our cause and, and what, you know, how can we bring you closer to it if you are passionate enough. I know, I, you know, you and I are both in. Carolina, of course, uh, uh, you’re in, you’re in Chapel Hill. Chapel Hill. I got my baby blue sweater on, right? Yeah, you support, uh, WUNC Public Radio. Uh, I am in Emerald Isle on the coast. I support, uh, PRE Public Radio East in, uh, out of New Bern. I listen to that one too sometimes. OK. Oh, good. OK, I’m from the eastern part of the state. You’re from North Carolina originally, yeah, from the coast, yeah. Where, where on the coast? Um, Bertie County near Edenton. Edenton, where’s, where’s that in relation to Wilmington, or uh, it’s north, it’s further north than the coast. It’s the inland, you know, we have the Outer Banks and the Inner Banks. Edenton was the former colonial capital of North Carolina, and it, um, um, it’s on the mouth of the Albemarle Sound. OK. All right, so that’s even north of where I am in Emerald Isle. Oh yeah, yeah, that’s, that’s, that’s further north on the coast going toward Tidewater, Virginia. Yeah, OK, right, right, very far north. Yeah, I have a tidewater accent. You’re a, well, OK. Well, you have a North Carolina accent. You’re, you’re, you’re born and raised in North Carolina. I’ve only been here 1010 years. Well, welcome. We, we claim you as the Tar Heel. Oh, thank you. I, well, let’s not get carried away as the Tar Heel. I don’t know, but, but, uh, I know you’re, I know you’re UNC. I, I might be more NC State, but that’s OK. Um, so, all right, so you’ve got 4 roles. You’ve got 4 roles for, uh, board member. As fundraisers, as ambassador, influencer, occasional asker, I like that occasional asker and steward. So let’s, let’s talk through, please. Could you, uh, let’s start acquainting folks with, uh, what’s, what’s an ambassador’s role? Well, the ambassadors of the board do two things. They spread the word wherever they go, which means they learn their talking points and how to talk to donors, and they also invite people in. They’re the hosts, you know, they might host tours, they might host coffees or porch parties. They, um, they just spread good cheer and invite people to get to know more about the, the organization. So they deal with groups of people and the influencers deal one on one. Um, they, um, they can work privately behind the scenes with specific donors, funders, corporations, maybe government officials, um, because they have a particular connection. And they may not want to be in front of this funder, but they can advise you, um, in a, in a, in an approach to this particular funding source that is appropriately timed, that understands the sensitivities of the situation and who the and who may influence this person. There may be gatekeepers, there may be. Uh, I mean, you know, it, it’s, it’s a lot of nuance, nuance, um, when it comes to, um, approaching and developing a relationship with a significant potential, right. So, OK, so we have, yeah, so we have the, um, uh, we have the ambassador, we have the influencer. How do we, before we carry on with the other two, how do we Suss out who’s best in, in, in which of these roles and who’s gonna, because we want our board members to be comfortable. That’s and sometimes board members can play two roles. OK. How do we, how do we figure out what, what, where, where they’d be best suited? Uh, well, the rule of thumb is you meet privately with each board member. And just chat with them about their interest and who they know. They’re not going to reveal who they know in a large meeting, but they will probably in a private conversation with you and share a lot of very helpful information. You know, I have a, a girlfriend who’s an heiress, and she, you know, she, we like to do things together, but I don’t, I’m, I don’t want to like approach her. I could approach her and say, would you be interested in learning more about the botanical garden? Um, or I can do that. I can ask her if she’s interested or not, but I’m not gonna directly approach. I can coach other people. You know, I can easily coach other people. You have a friend who’s an heiress. Wow, I don’t know any heiresses. Well, you know, or heirs. I don’t know heirs or heiresses. She lucked up. What can I say? She lucked up. She, she lucked up. That is that she lucked up? Yeah, it’s a Southern phrase. Yeah, I don’t know. lucked out. I would say lucked, she lucked out. You say lucked up? Yeah. All right. I’ve heard married up. But, uh, I haven’t heard lucked up. Married up is more of a commitment than luck up. You better watch it. I have a lot of Southern colloquial phrases. Well, I’m gonna call them out because, uh, uh, everybody is not from the South, so I, I, I need to make sure that everybody understands what we’re, OK. Hey, Tony, Tony, one time, one time, you know, I’ve done a. A lot of board workshops in my career and the Actuarial Society of North Carolina, I mean of of of the US Actuarial Society, yeah, uh, and hired me and brought me in for a, a day-long workshop. They, the, the, the board members really wanted to know how to raise money. They were very motivated. And so here I am in the Midwest talking to these very people who are very precise, you know, actuaries, and, um, I’m using, I’m using y’all. OK, because I’m gonna be myself, right? And, uh, the, there, there was one of the guys who did a chart of how many times I said y’all, he called, that’s 3 times during the course of the day he was keeping, he was keeping a little hash marks. All right, I’m not that harsh. I’m not, well, he’s an actuary. He’s a counter. Oh, it was funny. I just thought it was hilarious. He’s a num numerical, uh, yeah, he’s a numbers person. All right, hash mark. All right. I’m not, I don’t have any hash marks. I’m not keeping track. Let me go, let me go back to finding out who should be an ambassador versus an influencer. We like to know, um, um, we like to meet, ideally you meet with people one on one, and you, and you see if you can do that at least annually, right? You meet each board member at least annually for their, for a conversation. Yeah, but some organizations don’t want the development directors or fundraising people talking to their board, you know. All fundraising, they’re all different. So hopefully you can meet with board members and chat with them about what, how they’re interested in supporting fundraising or, or this, this, this annual meeting may be with the CEO. This may be a CEO board member meeting. Yeah, OK, yeah, yeah, yeah, um, so, um, my dog is barking in the background. I hope it’s, can you hear it? I love animals. No, no, it’s. My husband’s gone, so the dog is wrapping away over there. Um, but, um, so, so, um, sometimes also when I’m doing a board workshop, I will, uh, I’ll describe these roles and we’ll talk about them all. And I’ll, I’ll put the board member, I like to do small group conversations, uh, on a topic like they’re 5 people to a table, 5 board members to a table, and I force them to talk about some of these fundraising topics. It’s really powerful, you know, and, and I’ll say, well, can y’all, can each table, um, discuss these two. Roles and see, see how, how it feels to you to take on one of these roles. And so people could talk to each other. Well, you know, I think maybe I could do this. I have found doing all the, all these workshops I’ve done over the years, Tony, is that especially with board member volunteers that the more I can get them to talk. The more they take ownership of and, and the more insights they develop and they, it lands, it lands so much differently, you know, you can’t just lecture to people, adults will turn you off. So getting them to think and have discussions is very powerful. It’s time for Tony’s take 2. Thank you, Kate. I’m thinking about Saying thanks to people who don’t hear thanks very much. Uh, I’ve been traveling a lot recently, both for client work and also for my book, and there’s a good bit more travel coming up the rest of this year. And so when you’re on the go, you know, it’s easy to forget, I think, simple courtesies. So I’m trying to be more conscious of saying thanks, uh, showing gratitude in very ordinary situations. Uh, to people who don’t hear thanks very much like. Uh, bathroom attendants in airports. I mean, everybody’s just in and out of the bathroom, you’re right? You either, you either got to your destination and you gotta get in your Uber or you gotta get to a meeting, or you’re connecting and you gotta get to your flight, or you’re just, you’re arriving at the airport and you gotta get to your flight. Nobody, nobody thinks of these folks. Uh, but when the bathroom is great, when the bathroom is clean, We’re grateful, right? And when it’s not, we’re disappointed and upset. So, I think just thanks for those folks. Um, I’m also thinking about people who prepare the, uh, the breakfast. At hotels, I stay at a lot of Marriotts. Actually, I stay only at Marriotts. And, uh, you know, breakfast is included. So yeah, of course, you’re entitled to the breakfast, but I like to poke my head in the kitchen and, uh, and thank the folks who are in there for breakfast or when they come out to replenish the scrambled eggs, uh, or they cut up, uh, strawberries. You know, I like to say, I like to say thank you. I’m trying to be more conscious of this. And at home. Um, I’ve, I’ve gotten very good at saying thank you to the garbage men. They come 3 times a week. Monday and Friday is garbage, and Wednesday is recycling. I, I live alone, so I’m hardly contributing. But when I do, when I put my Garbage can out and they pick it up. I make a point to go out and, and say thank you. So. I don’t know, I, I just, I think we should be more conscious of. Showing our gratitude in very ordinary routine places. And that’s Tony’s take 2. Kate. I think last time you had, you said something like this on Tony’s Take Two, I brought up crossing guards. This time I’m going to bring up school janitors, teachers, and security. I mean, I’m in the classroom now twice a week, so I’m also trying to like build relationships with the people that I’m now working with. Um, But they, they don’t get any recognition. Janitors, teachers. Uh, and security, security, yes, yeah, yeah. Very good, yeah, cuz you’re um, you’re doing your student teaching now on your way to your degree in education. Um, yeah, it’s, it’s, it’s good to thank folks like that. Just, even if it’s not necessarily a thank you, although thank you is outstanding, I think, just a hello, hello. What’s your name? You know, what’s your name? I see, I see you every day at the, at the entrance, Mr. or Ms. security person. What’s your name? Yes. He’s got you sorry. We’ve got booco butt loads more time. Here’s the rest of easy fundraising and friend making for board members with Gay Perry. Let’s go to the occasional asker. What, what’s this person’s responsibility. Sounds pretty clear, but yeah, well, the thing is, is that give us the details. Reason, reason we say occasional is that we don’t want, um, um, board members to just willy-nilly be asking all over the place. Uh, an ask needs to be planned. And it means, needs to be timed correctly, uh, board, uh, uh, and one of our rules in fundraising never surprise a donor with an ask. And so, uh, the occasional asker participates with the staff team or if there’s no staff with, um, with the, they, um, they wear a staff hat as well, like, is this person ready to have a conversation, you know, we teach a lot about permission. Say to the donor, would you like to have this conversation? Would you like to learn more? May we come see you? Uh, so, um, I think, uh, the occasional asker role helps me explain to board members how it’s supposed to be done, you know, strategically, strategically, yes, it’s a good word, strategically, and I thoughtfully, relationship-wise, where is this person on the, on our relationship spectrum versus this other person, and you know, ready, the other not ready. I’ll say to the board members, I’ll say, um. Have you ever been asked before? No, I’ll say, what happens if you ask a donor before they’re ready and everybody in the room goes, oh yeah, that is not a good idea, you know, and they’ve had these experiences too. So it, it is possible to help board members understand this stuff, but it’s not, but they don’t walk into the board role understanding how it all needs to work. No, this is your responsibility to help them understand. Yeah, I have fun with this. I enjoy doing this. And the 4th role is steward. Oh, yes, steward. Steward is a thank you committee of the board, you know, and the stewards are the people who adopt donor retention as, um, as something they’re going to help the staff tackle. Uh, you know, uh, the whole idea that an organization may be losing half of its donors every year or more or more, yeah, 70, 75%, yeah, maybe losing 1st, 1st time donors lost. Oh, the first time donors, yeah, they are very unlikely to stick. And the larger donors do send their donor retentions higher, but just explaining, helping board members understand the huge opportunities there are in donor retention and, and it’s the easiest ask in the world because these people are already donors right now. Let’s just get them to renew their gift and remain supporters. You know, so, um, so, so there’s so many ways to thank donors and I was talking about this at a little party last night, you know, because, uh, uh, there were some people who are interested in, in tips for my book. I said, well, let me give you a tip about this donor retention stuff. And the board, you know, the data says that when board members make thank you phone calls, uh, the donors will keep giving and the gifts will go up. Keep giving and the gifts and it’s such a simple call to make. All you’re doing is calling and saying thank you. If, if you don’t get the person, you leave a sincere, heartfelt voicemail message with a phone number, of course, so they can call back. Um, those are so simple. You’re just saying thank you. That’s it. Thank you. Why do you love us? Thank you for loving us. Why do you, you know, if you can engage them in a conversation, great, but they’re, they’re, they’re ideal for board members. Yeah. Yeah, and so these are such easy roles, you know, the ambassadors are like the social committee and, you know, the stewards of the thank you committee and, and, um, and, and nurturing those relationships at the beginning. And after, and after the first gift, you know, helps, uh, create, create donors that are gonna stick with you in the long run, this is how you build a culture of philanthropy too, is, um, is helping board members understand all these different roles and helping them get enthusiastic about how they can help because these are things that everybody can do. I’ve heard of the stewardship calls being a part of a board meeting. So, you know, maybe quarterly, the last half hour of the board meeting is, here’s the list. We’re all gonna call, we’re all going to call 6 people. Let, let’s, and if you don’t get them, you leave a sincere message, but let’s, let’s all do this, uh, as, as. Last part of a board meeting occasionally. And you know that helps, um, board members understand the whole fundraising process when they do that. It’s a wonderful way to to ease them in slowly into helping support fundraising and let me tell you, can I tell you a story? One of our stories, we love stories, yeah, one of our clients, um, this was a staff member who was doing some thank you phone calls and she just chose this gentleman who was routinely giving, um, $1000 a year, every year, regularly, $10,000 and so she called him and she had taken our trainings and she knew the questions to ask him like, I’d love to know how you came to be a donor. You know, and the guy started talking and, and she, they were talking about the mission and what his background was in this work and how he felt about it and he talked and talked. And then he, um, he, he said, you know, I’m so, um, committed to this cause. I want to make a $100,000 gift. Wow, boom, boom without an ask, without an ask, you know, so, um, that, that’s fantastic from a $1000 donor to a $100,000 donor without an ask, yeah, without, without asking, just having a conversation, yeah, um, and, and, um, and somebody was writing to me recently because I always ask people to try these ideas and sit, let me know how they’re doing. One person wrote and she said, you know, I’ve been having these donor meetings and when I asked one person why, how they came to be a donor, she opened up like a flower. Yeah. Isn’t that wonderful? Yeah, that’s sweet. Yeah, people, you know, yeah, people who are invested in our work, yeah, you know, it’s special to them to get a call from a board member or in that case, you, the story you just told, that was a staff member. But, but to just to get a call or a handwritten note. I’m a big supporter of handwritten notes. A handwritten note from the CEO or a handwritten note from a board member. You know, these, these things are, they’re such easy, easy, but enormously valuable touch points that, you know, we overlook them because we think, oh, what’s a phone call? But it’s a phone call of thanks. That’s it. It’s a little bit, it’s, you took 5 minutes to write a hand note that nobody does. So it’s going to stand out because it’s going to come. The little card is going to come, it’s going to be hand addressed. It’s going to stand out. Yeah, it’s going to stand out and And it, um, and the money available in donor retention is so great. Right now, we’re looking at the year-end fundraising for 2026 and I tell everybody, all my workshops and talks, I say, um, uh, add up every, add up the money. Um, well, add up all the donors who have given so far this year, and then the donors who have not yet given, who have not yet renewed their gift this year, and look, look at how much money is available to this organization if you do a good job between now and the end of the year. Start your year-end campaign with a thankathon. You know, start it with a thankathon. Very good, yeah, yeah. You make the point that, uh, the first gift is never the largest gift. Absolutely. And I think that plays obviously into the stewardship we’re talking about, but, you know, say, say some more about that. Well, I guess the correct way to do it is the first gift is hopefully never the largest gift. OK, hopefully, because, um, a lot of our research on donors shows that. Um, when donor donors make a first gift, they’re sort of testing out the organization. You know, do I like these people? Um, do they, do they know that I’m giving and I, am I anonymous? You know, I don’t want, I personally, I don’t want to be an anonymous donor. If I’m a monthly donor to at least 10 organizations, I, I hope they know I’m a monthly donor. So, so that, uh, looking at every donor with the potential that they have a long-term future with your organization also helps change your perspective a lot. And as you know, that the people who have been giving to your organization regularly, even small amounts, you know, maybe 10 years straight or 20 years straight, you’re in their will. You’re the plan giving expert, isn’t that right? I know a thing or two about planned giving. Yeah, I know a little bit, but the people who are most likely, most likely to make planned gifts. Yeah, those long-term loyal committed donors. Yep, yep, they don’t have to be major donors. They certainly can be, but they don’t even have to be major donors. Just, it’s that long-term loyal support. Those are your best planned giving prospects. You’re right. You’re right. And people who feel committed. Yeah, they are, because they’ve been giving to you for decades. I mean, it’s not unusual to see someone who’s given 2025, maybe 30 years, and these are not necessarily large gifts, but it’s the consistency. They, they, they love you so much, they think about you at least once a year. Maybe, maybe you see 20 years of giving and 25 or 28 gifts, because some years it’s multiple gifts. And again, not necessarily large gifts, but, but that kind of commitment. Um, you, uh, you have some thoughts about boards investing in planned giving. Oh yeah, I have thoughts about board members investing in fundraising too. I have all chapter. On, um, on strategic decisions that board members make. Because, ah. Over and over and over, board members look at the cost of fundraising as an expense. It’s just like money down the tube. Can we cut this expense? Can we cut this expense? But the fact is, the money you spend on fundraising is an investment because it pays for itself and, and it returns. And so the more, the more you invest in, I mean, the data, data is all over the place. The more you invest in fundraising, the more money you will raise. Uh, so I, I tell sometimes when I’m working with this really small organization that’s struggling with um building infrastructure. Um, I say to them, you know, here you are, you have $1 and you’re trying to feed hungry children or put coats on them or cure disease. You, you know, you, you really need to spend that whole $1 on your program, but if you don’t take part of that, um, that $1 and spend it on your organization, you will never grow. You will be on the hamsterswheel forever and you’ll stay stuck and so people go, oh, OK, whether they, whether they bring that through when it comes time to do budgeting is another story. Another point you make is that major gifts often come from folks you, you already know. They come from insiders. These folks just haven’t been cultivated and stewarded for becoming the next major donor. Yeah, they have not been cultivated at all. In fact, Penelope Burke’s great research, um, she’s, she’s no longer, um, involved with fundraising, but she, she would say that you, every organization has got major gift prospects, major gift donors in its database, but unfortunately they’re small donors and they’re not being treated. Like they have major potential and so you’ve got sleepers inside your donor database. That’s why you have to treat everybody with warmth and love and and help them feel appreciation. I want to mention the word feel, uh, the more and more, the longer I’ve been in fundraising and read the research through the years, it’s how people feel that is so important, you know, people want to, um, feel connected, they want to feel appreciated, they want to feel passionate. They want to feel good about their gifts, uh, and, and, and, uh, when we, when we, when we do a thank you note full of a gift receipt, which may, we may need to do, but you make it transactional, you, you miss the magnificence and the joy and the passion of somebody’s support for your work. Well, you can send the gift receipt, but you can also send a sincere thank you note or, or a phone call. Well, both, um, maybe both even, um, uh, an informal call, and then a formal thank you note, as well as the gift receipt. You know, that, that IRS required document for every gift over $250. It’s not one or the other, right? We can do it all. I know, and I, I, I’ve worked with some organizations that were still doing this thing called an annual meeting. Because that was required in the bylaws. Very boring, right? Very boring. Nobody wants to come. But if you turned your annual meeting into an annual donor appreciation event and made it into a party, the donors would show up. What’s, what’s the annual meeting? that’s some bylaws require. An annual meeting of the board you’re talking about no, of, of, of, of members. So, if it’s a, if it’s a a specific type of agency, if it’s a membership organization, maybe you know, and, and museums and botanical gardens and, uh, the certain types are, are usually organized according to membership, which is a real mess if you ask me, but that’s not my topic today. No, yeah, I, I understand. All right, um, something we’ve, we’ve kind of talked around, but let, let’s, let’s get into detail about the Dividing up the roles, the fundraising roles between the board. We, we identified 4 roles for the board, but what’s the, the, you know, what’s the division between the board and the staff? How do you see the staff supporting the board in those 4 roles? Let’s talk about that relationship and, and, you know, that, that can be a difficult relation that can be a difficult issue because Um, we see more and more that board members don’t understand the line between, um, their role and the staff’s role. Uh, people join boards to give their opinion and so many board members are not going to particularly give opinions about the program area, um, but they’re certainly going to give their opinions about, um, fundraising. So there I’m following somebody on substack right now who talks a lot about board members who overstep, uh, and try to give fundraising advice to the staff team. So I just want to touch on this as, as a perennial issue in many organizations that board members are not educated. And even if you educate them, they feel like they are empowered to provide input into fundraising strategy itself. Uh, so I do make those points gently in the book since this is written 4 board members, but also, um, the role of staff is to be the quarterbacks of all these donor relationships, um, and I have seen volunteers get really enthusiastic about a relationship and then drop the ball. And or the the the board member may participate in some way and then nothing else happens because they don’t do the follow up. So staff is the glue to track the donor relationships, to be sure that activity is happening with important donors. And if the board member volunteers to do something and they don’t do it, then the staff figures out another way for the board, for the donor to feel, feel, feel good about the organization. So staff quarterback, staff does the follow-up. Staff sets up ask meetings, Staff briefs board members, helps choose, um, it helps develop strategy for big asks in collaboration with influencers and occasional askers. I see the um the, the, the problem that you were describing, board members overstepping and, you know, getting into fundraising strategy. That’s, that’s the CEO’s responsibility to set, set those boundaries and enforce. The boundaries and say, you know, that, that’s really, that’s really a staff role. What, what, what, what we need you to bring for us is either ambassador, influencer, occasional asker or steward, you know, but, and, and we want your help in, in those respects, but, you know, uh, we, we, we can’t take direction from all, all the board members. That’s, that’s, that’s really my role and the, and our development director’s role, if there is one. So you have to delicately enforce those, those boundaries. I would say that a lot of the executive directors, um, um, are nervous about establishing that kind of boundary. Yeah, but that’s when you get overreaching. If you don’t enforce, I mean, it’s the same as, uh, I don’t know, maybe this is not a, a, a very fair analogy, but, uh, and I’m, and I’m the guy who doesn’t even have children. But to me, it’s like, it’s, it’s similar to enforcing boundaries around children. If you, if you don’t enforce them, they’re going to be tested. And adults are not that much different. You’re right. But, but if you, if you do step in, most adults will, will learn from a, a, a gentle admonition. But, uh, too, but I, I serve on the botanical garden board. And I chair the development committee, and we’ve got some new board members who are beating, beating certain topics to death that they think need to happen. Yeah, I can’t, I try to explain it to them, but I’m just a fellow board member. It sounds like they may have come on the board with an agenda that, that they want to see, you know, whatever. They have this idea, and it’s such a great idea, and I don’t understand why the staff can’t implement this idea. You know, when you have that, I mean, that’s part of the landscape of nonprofit boards is to have people like that. And hopefully you have a solid, either a solid board chair or a solid executive director that understands that yellow line. That you don’t go outside the yellow line of board roles, and I will say too that, um, people don’t talk about board roles. People don’t, the board members don’t know what’s expected of them because so many boards are different. And so, um, just a, just a frank discussion of the board roles and responsibilities rarely happens. They might sign a document that this is what I’m supposed to do, but, uh, it’s not necessarily enforced and it’s not discussed. Yeah, not right, not enforced, not discussed. We, we avoid difficult conversations, but they end up becoming 10 times more difficult if, because the problem festers. And, and now we’re, and now we’re having to manage, uh, a problem maybe between a, a board member and, and some staff because the board member is overreaching. So now it’s becoming an employee, team member problem. We’ve got to, you know, you, you, you can’t shrink away from these, these difficult conversations. That’s why you’re the CEO. That’s why you’re the board chair. And, and, and Tony, the, the real challenge is once you get a board operating correctly, 1/3 of them leave and you have a whole new group of. Yeah, well, well, you, yeah, but you have the 2/3 that can help socialize the new 1/3 to the, to the right way of doing things and, and the, and the board’s appropriate role. Yeah. Let’s, um, I like, excuse me, I love, um, you know, like actionable tips, and you have a bunch of them, you have a bunch of them in the book. Um, what, what’s something, if we have a fearful board member, what’s something we could ask them to do in the next week or so, fearful around fundraising? Oh, do thank you calls and give them a script and make it fun, you know, I suggest a thankathon is bring pizza in, but make people come together. People, people, I mean, after the pandemic, people are so used to Zoom, which, um, which does not create any sense of collaboration. It, it, it really hamstrings a lot of groups meeting on Zoom all the time. So I think helping people, you got to train people a little bit about why, why these thank yous are so important. What are we doing? donor retention. We want donors to feel good about being a supporter of our organization. Yeah, there’s that feeling, feeling again. How do you feel about the organization? How do you feel it treats you? Yeah. Yeah. So that’s, that’s a great way to deal with a fearful boy. Let me, let me another story. OK, this is a thankathon story. So working with this group and I said, thankathon, and they said, OK, we’re gonna have a thank, we’re gonna launch our year-end campaign with a thankathon. And there was, it was a medical facility and there was this older gentleman trustee. And he was very nervous about this whole thinking thing. He just was very, he was reluctant, but he was a good sport and he showed up for this night, pizza and everything, you know, camaraderie is always helpful too. And, um, so he made a couple of phone calls and one call he made, this is a true story now, one call he made was to another gentleman who had had a great experience at the hospital and the two men talked maybe 15 minutes. About the hospital and all of these things. Two weeks later, the person who called, got the thank you call, sent in a $10,000 gift. And said, I just enjoyed my conversation so much. You know, and the board member who was fearful, so I was so pleased. He said, maybe this stuff is not so bad after all. So, you know, Tony, we, we, we belittle, we, we make fundraising this awful thing down in the gutter. We make ourselves small when it’s all about money. And then if you think about high up on the hill, we’re changing the world, white light, making people happy, making people feel their passion, you know, um, doing good for the world. And it, and it’s, it’s the same activity is, is your point of view. Think It is, your, your point of view is, is it’s all in the mind. Yeah. And, and it’s also, it, pardon me? It’s how you approach it. which, which is driven by how you think about it, and that’s where the book comes in because board members are thinking. Incorrectly about what, what fundraising is as a board member. They’re, they’re thinking, you know, it’s where you started. They’re, they’re thinking I have to ask a bunch of strangers or my friends for money, and I don’t want to do it. And that’s, well, that’s, that’s the value of your work, that’s the value of the book. And that’s been my life’s work really with all these board members. You know, my motto is when in doubt, throw a party. And it always makes them laugh, but you know, I do that deliberately because lighten things up. And I say to the board members, I say, listen, if you, if you can have fun doing what you’re doing, if you can have fun changing the world, if you have a sense of passion and camaraderie and enjoyment, what’s gonna happen? You’re gonna bring more people in who wanna hang with you. You’re gonna attract more attention in the community because people are gonna be talking about it. You’re, you’re gonna raise more money. And change the world faster if you, if you can level up that level of enthusiasm and enjoyment. We call it fellowship. You know, I enjoy hanging out with people I know. It’s fun. So, um, I do think that if we let board members get help, foster board members, um, personal relationships, it’s, um, it’s very important to help for board members to know each other because they will enjoy each other, getting to know each other. The book is Easy fundraising and Friend Making for board members. Gayle, where is it available? It’s available on Amazon and Goodreads, and I have a Kindle, a hardcover, and a soft, softcover paperback, and it went on sale yesterday and we achieved number one bestseller status in a couple of categories too, Tony. And, um, I’m so excited to because my goal, uh, my goal is really to get this into the hands of as many board members as possible and, and help them change the world. That’s my goal. Gail Perry. Founder, outstanding, founder of the Gail Perry Group. Are you, uh, are you active on LinkedIn, Gail Perry? Uh, very much LinkedIn. You are very much active on LinkedIn. All right, so folks can connect with you there. I know we’re, all right, I know we are connected. All right. And if y’all, if anybody listening is interested in some board workshops, I’m happy to chat with you about how to approach those. Thank you very much, Gail. It’s great to see you. Congratulations again. Congratulations again on the book. Thank you, Tony. Congratulations on yours too. Thank you. Okey dokey. Bye. Next week, hiring your development team with Sarah Olivieri. If you missed any part of this week’s show, I beseech you, find it at Tony Martignetti.com. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your associate producer, Kate Martinetti. The show’s social media is by Susan Chavez. Mark Silverman is our web guy, and this music is by Scott Stein. Thank you for that affirmation, Scotty. Be with us next week for nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. Go out and be great.

Nonprofit Radio for September 21, 2026: Be Present To Save The Universe

 

Paul Gordon: Be Present To Save The Universe

If you want your presentations and messages to persuade people, you need to be present; clear; confident; unscripted; and have fun. Whether you’re meeting one-on-one, one-on-one-hundred, or you’re on stage facing 2500. Whether you’re in person or virtual. Paul Gordon preaches the gospel of “Get out of your own way in order to say what you truly mean.”

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Every nonprofit struggles with these issues. Big nonprofits hire experts. The other 95% listen to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Trusted experts and leading thinkers join me each week to tackle the tough issues. If you have big dreams but a small budget, you have a home at Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio.
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Welcome to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. I’m your aptly named host and the pod father of your favorite hebdominal podcast. Oh, I’m glad you’re with us. I’d be stricken with idiopathic intracranial hypertension if you pressured me with the idea that you missed this week’s show. Here’s our associate producer, Kate, to tell us what’s up this week. Hey Tony, here’s what’s up. Be present to save the universe. If you want your presentations and messages to persuade people, you need to be present, clear, confident, unscripted, and have fun. Whether you’re meeting one on 11 on 100, or you’re on stage facing 2500, whether you’re in person or virtual. Paul Gordon preaches the gospel of get out of your own way in order to say what you truly mean. On Tony’s take 2. My book and I thank you. Here is, be present to save the universe. It’s a pleasure to welcome the man who preaches the gospel of getting out of your own way in order to say what you truly mean. In business and in life, Paul Gordon has a worldwide audience over 2 billion people for his TV and stage work, including David Letterman and Lincoln Center. He’s certain that his 7 years a garbage man are as essential as his fancy careers as a performer and a university professor. He’s at the Paul Gordon.com. And he’s on LinkedIn. Although try to find him on LinkedIn. We’ll, we’ll, we’ll, we’ll talk about that. Paul Gordon, welcome to Nonprofit Radio. It’s a true pleasure to get to speak with you, my man. Thank you. I, I felt like we connected through your pitch and, uh, uh, our, our various emails, uh, even though you’re halfway around the world in Copenhagen, Denmark. Yeah, right. The, the energy bleeds through in your writing, and, you know, as we exchange email info just as clearly as your energy on your podcast. It’s, uh, you know, it’s delightful because you, you bring it. Well, you’re very gracious. Uh, you’re the same through just email and, uh, your website, uh, some YouTube videos I watched. You’re, it’s a sort of an infection, an infectious, not an infection, you’re not, you’re an infection. We, we can, we can always try to find the cure, and it, it, it should be, we, we should be the antidote to all stuff. So yeah, we are the antidote, yes, but we’re not, we don’t need an antidote because you’re not an infection, you’re not a streptococcal infection or something. No, not at all. Uh, but, but the energy is infectious for sure, right? Hopefully, hopefully on a regular basis that, and, and, and we will talk about that because in fact your, uh, listener viewership is hopefully. Within the wish to embody and embrace this exact feeling of the contagion, the infectious quality of energy that compels, right? And compels whether we are connected by screen or I or live and in person. I, I happen to prefer, much prefer live and in-person audiences. However, I, I very much believe that you can connect. Through the, through the airwaves, through the internet, and, and reach people the way you’re. You’re encouraging us to do, uh, and training people, not just in mere encouragement, but, you know, you, you train people to do. So this is, so let’s first, let’s, let’s first clear the, uh, make it clear that this is connecting with people, and, and an audience might be one person, right? It might be a one on one meeting, or it might be an audience of 2500 in a, in a theater or you work in Lincoln Center. What, what, this can be learned. This can be learned. Yes, presence, you know, what I refer to as presence is a 100% trainable skill. Um, it’s not a personal, personality trait that you’re born with or born without, um. For the most part, I have broken this down into the obstacles that people have from when they were very young. They either are bringing forward their mommy issues, their daddy issues, their inner critic issues, and their peer issues, and these are the things that we carry with us, um. Without Without finding the ways to shed ourselves of them, so that they can just slough off and let us be the more, you know, profound version of ourselves, right? Yeah, and Rather than trying to be the, the persona that we think. We need to embody in order to connect in, again, in a meeting one on one or a, a meeting with, all right, maybe most of us don’t do stage presentations of 200 to 2500, but 50 or 100 at a conference, eminently likely. Um, but we feel, we, we feel there’s a, there, there’s a persona or a facade. That, that we ought to, ought to bring. And, and we put this up and I think audiences and, and individuals recognize it. I think you see, I think people see right through it. It, it, they may not articulate it, but they feel that I just can’t connect with the person or the person is just not connecting with me. Right. And a long time ago in the, you know, celebrity, you know, performance world on movies and stage and screen and what have you, or in, you know, fashion, it was referred to as the it factor, right? Who’s the, who’s the current it girl or that thing. And in fact, People are focused very, very deeply on the formula that is preached by so many to simply, you know, do it this way and you will, uh, have enough. And in fact, we can smell it on people. When people are performing their safety. Often they have been. They have allowed themselves to be convinced that Memorizing. Doing the copy paste research currently now in this, you know, world of massive AI growth, allowing the script to be delivered unto you by Claude or whichever. They then are taking exactly that and they think if I can just. Quoting you, here’s my air quotes, get it right. I will have done my due diligence, and that is so contrary to what most people want to feel when they’re sitting in the audience, whether it’s live or virtual. Because in fact. Anytime you’re performing your safety, you are doing yourself a disservice because it reads flat. Yeah, performing your safety. All right, let, let’s talk about presence. This, this is essential to your work, it’s core. Uh, you, you choose presence instead of confidence, although they, you can distinguish them if you like, but, but your, your core is, uh, is about presence. Please, uh, just put a quarter in the slot. I’m putting a quarter in the slot. Yeah, good. So, Here’s an important distinction. So many are wanting to feel that confidence, and in fact, when you develop your inner core sense of what it is you’re burning to speak about, what it is you have as what I call your passion play of truth. You can learn the exercises that allow you to be able to express that stuff from within, from your soul, and when you allow yourself not to say what you think people want to hear, but in fact say what you know they need to be explained, they need to be offered. You will then be actually training your entire, your, your body, your voice, your face. To step up into that which gives you the confidence. The reason I just explained it that way is that so many are wanting the confidence and they go to people who are like, you know, confidence coaches or, you know, mindset shift people, but actually it works the other way around when you learn how to express what you care about, that builds the confidence that then feeds the loop. That develops even further your ability to offer the expressions, the phrases, that which you truly care about, which then in turn improves your confidence, and so on and so on. It bounces back and forth in an upward. Asymptotic, you know, curve. Makes sense. Yes. Um, there’s a lot there. Um, the, the passion play, the face, the exercises, uh, where, where should we go? Can you share an exercise? Uh, I, I like, I, I like action items for our listeners. Uh, they’re not gonna, this is not gonna replace working with you, but if you share an exercise or two, you have these rituals that you can do. 5 minutes a day or right, right, yeah, yeah, share, share some, share some of this. Yeah, easy. And, uh, you know, I’m, I’m delighted to. I am not one of those, uh, gatekeepers of stuff. These are things that I really want everybody to embody because they then. You know, and, and I’m saying this in order to kind of get people, you know, juiced up and jazzed about the idea that they can separate themselves from the generic herd of drones that are all around us, right? So for starters, let’s just take a look at this. You’re, you know, I, I, I was on the Letterman show that went out to 40 million people. I did a live gig in front of my biggest audience was 25,000. That was a big audience, but, um, I’ve also performed and presented for little kids at, uh, you know, a, a, a classroom of 7 year olds, you know, and, you know, maybe there were, maybe there were 10, maybe there were 12. That’s fine, it doesn’t matter. Here’s the thing. You look into that camera. Or if you’re yeah and if you’re on the Letterman show, you’re looking into a camera. If you’re on a stage, you’re doing the same exact thing, and it is one person. Now, many, many listeners here may know, oh yeah, right, it’s one person, and that’s a no-brainer. However, I’m gonna step it up a little bit. Who are you speaking to when you’re looking into that camera? Most people are. Imagining that it is, you know, that scary bunch of people that they’re gonna ask for money, right? Or you’re performing and you, oh God, please like me. That’s not the person that you’re actually choosing in your own being, in your own mind when you present to present to. You are staring right into that lens or out into an audience to one person who is a dear friend of yours. Who knows you, who gets you, who supports you, and who at every step of what you do is nodding and smiling, saying, yeah, more, yeah, more, that’s actually you making that choice to address. In that way. At first I was thinking of my wife, but, uh, the, the more you described it, the, the more I really know that, that’s the, that’s, she, she’s not the right one. Right? It’s, it’s often and, and started that way, didn’t end up, didn’t end that way. OK. And, and, and I want, I want your wife to know when she hears this, that if she needs some, uh, retribution, then she can call me and I’ll come over and I’ll hold your arms for her. It was. But, but yeah, thank you, it was the part where asking for more and more and more. That’s where, that’s where she, that’s where she dropped out. More, more, more. She’s not in, she’s not up for, uh, it’s more like enough, enough, enough. Uh, yeah, oh, stop, stop impressing me, big. Um, but, but yeah, so let’s, let’s get back to this because in fact, um, it’s, it’s not, it’s not your spouse often. And the reason why it’s not your spouse, it ought to be one of your dearly beloved close friends. This is the person with whom you would talk in the same exact way. Across the acro across from them at a lunch where you’re just hanging out and you’re actually explaining a new cool idea. You’re getting the hang of rehearsing it, you’ve paid attention to it and you know what it is you wanna say, but that’s who you’re speaking to, so. Remember. That this is a, a dear friend. It might be kith. It might be kin, but This is the type of supporter. That gets you, and that’s who you look at. And when you’re in, when you’re on a stage in front of a bunch of people. Each person you look at, and it’s important to actually make eye contact with each of the different people. Lots of people, yeah, right, there’s lots of people. If there’s a depth, you’re looking to the back, you’re looking to the front, you’re looking to the sides, but each time you’re not looking at a different person and you’re not assuming that that has changed. Each one. Is that same incarnation of someone who supports you and gets you. So you’re making eye contact with that person who’s important to you as you’re making contact with the physical eyes that are in the audience, if we’re, if we’re in person, or they’re, they’re on the other end of the camera. Yeah, uh. OK, OK. So that’s, that’s the first thing. That’s the first thing. I just want, you know, and, and some, some of your listeners may say, yeah, OK, boring. Next, I’ve gotten that before. I know how to do that. OK, good. So let’s, let’s now go to the next thing because I touched on this idea of body, voice, and face. I am going to speak a little bit to the idea of what it is to extend yourself a little bit. Now, in this particular case, we’re talking on a Zoom call and I am standing. I’m standing for a very specific reason. I don’t have to, but. I stand in order to allow this to be something that is a little more um of a grand gesture for me. I get to get my ya yass out by allowing myself a little more dynamics. That Looking to one person and talking the way we explained actually is one of the early. Aspects of offering more dynamics. Now, for your voice, we wanna understand some dynamics too, for your body, we wanna understand some dynamics too, and for your face, we wanna understand some dynamics too, and in order to practice before you ever go anywhere, you can go beyond what is normal, beyond what, Is what you may consider acceptable in order to push yourself a little further so that you can pull back and actually have a broader sweet spot for your presentation ability. Does that make sense? Yeah, no, very much go beyond and then and then draw back to. Where, where you wanna be, but I, I like the idea of pushing the bounds of, I don’t know what, what, what’s, what’s, what’s acceptable. Go beyond where you would perform and then, and then recede a little bit. Exactly. And, and when you, when you recede back, you will have receded back. A step or two more advanced, uh, than you were before you had pushed, right? It’s like, uh, it’s, it’s like when we stretch muscles, um, we wake up or we’re doing exercise. I mean, I’m a trained dancer and performer, and, you know, the, the, the body as a tool, you stretch, so you stretch the muscles further and then they are more limber. So, uh, the reason I, that, you know, all that is a as as a prologue to this idea that why am I standing? Because this is part of the body dynamics. When you are standing. It allows you to have to confront a few things. One is that you are more capable of actually using. This space that I refer to as the camera universe when we’re doing virtual stuff and in fact if you’re on a stage, you are going to be standing at some point or another if you ever do a solo talk, you will in all likelihood at some point confront the need to be standing. So you have to get comfortable with it, and it’s brilliant to be able to get comfortable with it. Because you need to be comfortable in your own skin, but when you are standing in a virtual situation, your camera universe has more. Breadth of experience when you activate the entire thing. What people are seeing on the, you know, on their screen is your camera universe. That’s what they’re seeing. So you activate your ability to energize your screen and your presence by learning how to explore, standing upright. Legs a little bit wider than shoulder width so that you can play with moving from one side to the other, right? This is actually important. Why? Because you want to be able to use that. The next part of it is you can put both of your feet splayed one more forward than the other, so that you can play with moving back and forth, because in fact, When you’re leaning in to, you know, talk to your friend who supports you across the table. You share a secret and you do lean in. And you take a breather and you do relax back. That’s part of the dynamics. So having this gives you more of a freedom and. I’m gonna say something a little, you know, I don’t know how weird it may be to some of these people. Paul, what does that have to do with me because I spend most of my time sitting? Well, I’ll tell you this. Good question, and here’s your answer. It actually teaches you to incorporate yourself into the space, even when you’re seated. You will be more in touch with how you work within your camera universe once you have stood and played with some of this when you sit back down and consider yourself to be that. Sedated, docile version of yourself. You don’t have to remove the energy, even when you’re seated, and you get better at it by pushing further by playing with it when you’re standing. Well, that’s perfectly consistent with what we were saying. You, you may end up performing seated. But, but, uh, prepare, rehearse, and, and I don’t mean by, by rehearse, I don’t mean memorize, but, but work, work in advance, uh, beyond that. So you, you do have more agility. You, you do have a, a greater canvas to work with. And then when you’re seated, you know, that’s the, the, you’re receding back to where you’ll actually perform. But you will have, you, you’ll, yeah, yeah, it makes perfect sense. You’ll have a better, you’ll have a better feeling for your space. If you prepare by standing and, and, and moving, moving in dimensions that you’re not gonna, you’re not gonna do while you’re seated. But, all right, let, let’s, um, there’s so much here. I wanna talk about preparing your material. You, you alluded to not memorizing and, you know, using cloud to, to prepare your, your, your content. Uh, unscripting is what you refer to it as. I mean, I, I, I like to, I like to just think through versus memorize. I don’t like memorize, but, um, what, what, let’s prepare, help us prepare our, our content in, in, in your, in your method. No problem. You and I are both talking in a way that makes complete sense to us, and we are. Engaged in what I refer to as a relatively. Structured improvisation because we know what we are talking about and we know the why and we know the issues at play. That’s how we’re able to actually allow it to flow more. That’s the improvisational part. The structure of it comes from actually understanding what it is you want to talk about, which is based in why. Now, let’s get into, uh. A pre-Y concept here. It’s something that I refer to as essentiality, and it’s not a word I made up. Essentiality is a word, you can look it up. When you tap into the purpose. Of your mission, of your issue, of whatever topic, you wanna make sure that you are respecting it, honoring it with the due diligence to connect it to something really, really essential. And here’s my way of tapping into the essentiality. On a. Universal level. Down to the molecular. It is well known that anything with good intention actually can command a certain agency even over the molecules around us. So I want you to always be aware that when you’re saying something that you feel matters, you have thought about how this thing actually improves the entire universe. Your purpose for describing what it is. Is actually connected to saving the planet and the universe. That When you do that due diligence will allow you to know why you are saying what you’re saying. OK, that’s the bait, you know, that’s, that’s the. Precursor to this. So then you can have a loose structure that I can offer this simple 7 point structure that I have that I refer to as, it’s my 7-point structure broken down into anchor points, which, you know, some people can call them bullet points, some people can refer to it as other ways of breaking down an outline, but I, I think of this as anchor points. Each part of what you wanna say. You. Can reduce to a simple couple of words or a simple, simple phrase, so that that is the overarching umbrella of that aspect. And then when you practice that, not to memorize it, but you go into the essentiality of knowing what it is you wanna say and why you wanna say it, then each of those anchor points allows you to tap into that particular section. And then you can get better at letting it be that structured improv. The 7 point system we can talk about um. Yeah, uh, can, can we? Yeah, you wanna, I just wanna tell you, I, I love the idea of saving the universe. What I have to convey to you is that important. Yeah, and, and, and, and, and this is a great tie-in because I, I don’t want you to forget to bring up the ask because the ask, I think, is something, you know, this, this particular group of people, uh, hypothetically, theoretically, hopefully is, uh, is going to be addressing the issue of asking for money, right? Yeah. Yeah, so it does tie in very strongly to that, and I wanna touch on that with you with for, for their benefit in a little bit, um. So Those are the anchor points. Now, a, a 7 point structure for something I’ll, I’ll, I’ll just mention, um, you’re making, you’re making some. Uh, let’s talk about an online chunk of content. OK, here’s, here’s this is an example. You have a problem. That you know people are dealing with. And they actually are dealing with it poorly because they have been paying attention to some other schmo that you know is not guiding them in the way that you can. So it would be. The problem, and that’s the 2nd thing, because the intro is the 1st thing and we’re gonna actually address the intro afterwards. The problem that they’re dealing with, followed by the poor results that they are actually generating by going in the poor direction. Then. If you can explain to them that there are better results that can be achieved if they actually go in the way that you know will improve their situation. You can talk about those results. After which you can speak about your credentials on why you know this to be true. After which you can then offer them the afterglow that they achieve when they are actually engaged in the thing that you know helps them better. And then you can go to the call to action. Those are 6 steps and let’s go 77, that’s 7. Well, right, that, that is what I, I sort of, I, yes, so let’s, let’s take those in order and then we are going to now reverse engineer the introduction. Because once we have solidified that arc with those anchor points in each of those steps, then we can look back and we can say, what exactly is a somewhat controversial way of talking about. This topic. Your introduction. Wait, before, before you do that, I, I just wanna make sure everybody’s on the same page because they may not have been taking notes the way I was. So I have your introduction, the problem, the poor results, the better results, your credentials as speaker, the afterglow of achievement, and a call to action. Yes, OK, please, now you want to reverse engineer to the, uh, introduction, right, the introduction we leave until we have actually defined the others. So starting from number 2 until the call to action, right? Once we have that as the guts of the entire thing, we can then look at it and we can say, what is it that I’m actually trying to speak about here. And it is with. Your essentiality and your purpose, that you can muster enough gumption to actually say the introduction in a way that needs to be said, not in the nice way. For instance, for my stuff. It’s not that you’re bad at being on camera, it’s just that you suck because you’ve been paying attention to that scripted, templated bullshit out there. Drop that for Christ’s sake, for the love of everything you hold dear and sacred, right? And you know, and this is, this is just me playing with the idea that I, I can say what needs to be said. I don’t have to. Listen to some of that standard templated boilerplate. Softened. Rhetoric that’s not me. Yeah, middle of the road that offends no one and grabs no one that any schmo, you, you invoke the schmos. I love schmo. I talk about schmos all. Any schmo could, any schmo could do X, Y, Z. I’m always saying any schmo. So that any schmo could deliver, you know, again, milk toast offends no one, grabs no one. Offense, no one grabs no one. If it, you know, if you’re, if you’re performing that safety, you will read flat. That will, you know, flat is flat. There’s no way around it, except to say that it actually smells and feels worse to those people. Than they even realized because they’re not going to be paying attention. They’ll be, you know, quietly, silently swiping on their phones, um, coming up with their shopping list, whatever it is, and the stuff that’s memorable is the stuff that you know they need to hear. It’s time for Tony’s take 2. Thank you, Kate. My book and I thank you. You’ve been hearing about the book, uh, you, you’ve heard rumors, right? You’ve heard rumors about this book, this thing, Planned Giving accelerated. Uh, no, you’ve been hearing about it for, for weeks, and I thank you for Listening You know, uh, I, I shared a lot of milestones with you through the months, and of course, more very recently leading up to the launch, which was last week. As, uh As we Recognized in last week’s show with, uh, with Steven Mill. So, Just, you know, I thank you, uh, the book is out. It’s at, uh, wherever fine books are sold, which in our time means Barnes and Noble and Amazon. There’s a hardcover version, there’s a paperback version, and there is a Kindle version. There will be an audiobook version, but that’s a few months away. I have to actually record it, and I’m still involved in the deep in the promotion of the book. Got some speaking gigs coming up, got more podcasts coming up. So there’s still a lot of promotion going on. You don’t just launch it and then drop it, and then you got to launch it and then sell it. So, I’m, I’m involved with that. So I thank you very much for following my book journey through the many months. And That’s really um I would say that’s pretty much Tony’s take to. Thanks very much for following the book journey. Kate, I’m still waiting for my special uh signed copy to the associate producer. Yeah, after you go to Amazon or Barnes and Noble and buy it. And I’ll be happy to sign it for you. When you come to visit, I’ll make sure that I have it ready. I’ll get a little Sharpie and everything. Please do. We’ve got Bou butt loads more time. Here’s the rest of Be Present to Save the universe with Paul Gordon. Love it, uh, your, your philosophy. And all this is. It gets to being entertaining without being jokey, without, I mean, I, I used to do stand-up comedy as a, as a, uh, as an amateur. The, the most I ever got paid was $20 once. Uh, in, in, uh, I used to do this in New York City. So, uh, you know, you, but that’s, so I like to weave in a little, uh, some, some explicit entertainment, you know, but, but, For folks who haven’t, you know, if you haven’t done that, you don’t, you don’t need to, to be entertaining, to be interesting, to be, to, to, uh, uh, to grab people’s attention so that they’re not doing their shopping list. And that’s so that at the end, it’s not. Right. Wow, thanks. You know, yeah, it’s not that, it’s whoa. He moved me. I, I’m, I, I can only remember my, I, I, I, I can, yeah, I can only take back 3% because there was so much packed in here, but that 3% is gonna move my board or, uh, I’m gonna go have a conversation with the CEO or, you know, something. I, I, I’m gonna act on. Because I, I was moved to action to, uh, you know, to save the, save the planet. Right. There’s, and, and you’re bringing up a great thing because, uh, I’ve, I’ve done some, you know, I, I do stand-up, uh, currently here and I’ve done some of the strip live on the Upper East Side, uh. And, uh, you know, I’ve also, I, there, there was a show a long time ago called Caroline’s Comedy Hour. Um, and that was a, that was a great club, and did those gigs and so. Oh, you were a big name. You were a, you were a headliner. I was at, uh, I used to do, I did most of mine at Gotham Comedy Club on, uh, 6, 6th, uh, 23rd Street, 23rd between, uh, 6th and 7th, I think. Uh, but I was one of, you know, 8 or 10 comics. We all got 6 or 8 minutes on stage. Um, and you were, if you were doing Caroline’s. That, or, or what’s the one you mentioned on Upper East Side? Uh, yeah, the comic strip live, yeah, comic strip live, yeah. All right, so you were, you were headlining. So that’s why I hasten to say I was an amateur. However, yeah, however, it’s good because, you know, here we are talking about this and we may, um, uh, we may alienate some folks who say, well, I can’t be, uh, you know, entertaining, and this. That you introduced this is worthwhile riffing on for a moment. The, the performative nature, what I offer, I mean, my, my, my book is, you know, mean it, and, you know, this mean it method that I truly believe in. I got my master’s degree in developing processes for this type of stuff, um. The performative nature. Comes from the fact that practically everything we pay attention to has a theatrical quality. OK, that is to be, uh, Separated from the concept of learning theater, you don’t need to become an actor, right? You don’t need to do that in order to understand that a slice of life on a YouTube video or whatever type of social media thing where you take a look, and it’s just a slice of life, or if you’re standing there looking at a sunset, these are theatrical by nature and the theatricality of it. Has nothing to do with building a theater, uh, you know, years of theater training. OK, good. I just wanna say that can be learned by anybody. As soon as you. Embrace. The fact that everything in your life to a certain extent is theatrical. Once you are allowing yourself to be present and actually hear yourself say the things you’re saying. You want to allow yourself to enjoy being there. And when you are, or not even there, you’re enjoying being here right now. And when you can allow yourself to hear yourself think, you can actually allow yourself to have that improvisational space. That gives you the chance to enjoy being there. And then you might surprise yourself with a little analogy, a short little story. You don’t have to go off on tangents that go nowhere. Short little story that you get a kick out of. I can tell you a story that I can get a kick out of, and then it affects the way people are paying attention. Right. Now, I, I, I do wanna come back to this idea of vocal dynamics because I just have been using with you and you have been using it too, and the audience needs to understand that. Your vocal dynamics. Allow you to be able to also own a certain audio space and that is pauses. It is when you speed up the tempo. It is when you talk quietly to share something and when you talk loudly because you’re excited and those are also trainable exercises. And then you allow yourself to embody more of that. So there’s the body dynamics, there’s the voice dynamics, and there’s also the face dancing that I refer to, the art of face dancing, which is just the neck up presentational ability to animate yourself. All that is making you interesting, entertaining without being an entertainer, which is what you’re getting to. Uh, it, it, it, it draws people to you and to your, your, your content, your message, even more, uh, content’s not good, draws people to you and, and your message. Yeah, let’s talk, go ahead. Why? I was just gonna say it, it, it, the next step of this is the whole idea that when you’re allowing yourself to, you know, animate that space that you’re in, whether it’s virtual in your camera universe or whether it’s on the stage, and you’re really grooving with this stuff because you have gotten it under your skin and you’re allowing yourself to do it. Then you’re having fun. And when you’re having fun, it’s actually, you know, like, like we started the whole joke of this, uh, this interview. It’s contagious, it’s infectious, it’s, it’s a thing that people get and they will lean in because of it. Absolutely. Uh, not even gonna amplify it. Absolutely, absolutely true. People know you’re having fun. They feel it. They just feel it. They feel it. Let’s talk about Paul Gordon. I, I don’t know. Uh, Letterman, what were these, uh, we’ve got, we’ve got Garbage man, we’ve got Letterman, we’ve got salmon fishing, but Letterman, most people still, thankfully, now in a couple of years, people are gonna be, well, you have to go to YouTube to see who David Letterman was, but we’re not there. We’re not there now. So, what, what, what was your, your part in, uh, in the Letterman show? Um, my, um, I had a I had a movement based, um. Performance company for many years and we traveled around the world doing our stuff on TV shows and stages and festivals, what have you, and we, uh, we were invited to do our gig at the new Victory Theater, uh, Broadway House, uh, for, for some weeks. Forty-Second Street, New Broadway Theater. Exactly. Forty-Second Street, yep. And, uh, uh, great space, wonderful place. Um, we got invited after having done our stuff for many years, and, uh, the Letterman folks saw us there and they invited us to do the, one of our pieces. Um, we were, uh, here, here, you’ll get a kick out of this because it’s a little hard to describe or define, but our company was a blend of Movement, dance-based stuff, um, acrobatics, comedy, a certain amount of circus thrown in, audience participation, and ingenious costumes and props. So we blended all of that in our show and one of, uh, well, two of the pieces that we created were very. Attractive. They were, they were sexy on TV, so we got invited on TV shows around the world to do those particular pieces, and we had this one with Velcro balls and Velcro hats. Um, I’ll send you the link. It’s on my, uh, performance page on my website, and, um. It. We, we did it on Letterman. Um, uh, Letterman, we, we got a wonderful, uh, note of thanks from Dave’s producer afterwards because he said he, he walks, he, he walks off during the performances, he walks off stage and just does whatever he wants to cause he needs to take a break. And for yours, he has a, he had a screen, a monitor down in his desk so that he had a glass, uh, he had a glass desk and he had a monitor down in his desk, and, uh, the, the producer said, Um, he just sat there kind of with his, uh, mouth open and a big smile watching your thing the entire time he, uh, he got a real kick out of you guys. So, uh, that was very nice. My mom was there. I invited my mom. Some of my best friends were there, um. And, uh, that, that, that, that video is at uh the Paul Gordon.com. Yeah, the Paul Gordon.com. OK. What’s the name of the company? What was your company name? The company was called Second Hand Dance Company and, um, I’m currently in the process of, uh, putting us on Wikipedia so that people can find us there cause it, it was never done before. Um, we, uh, yeah, we, we, we traveled, we traveled around the world for 16 years and, uh, Did our thing our way. Excellent, excellent. What, what’s the, uh, garbage man gig? So, um, yeah, I, I have done, I have, I have done a lot of different things that you mentioned that pie shop in Pietown, New Mexico, uh, the salmon fishing up in Alaska. And, uh, I’ve done a lot of different jobs and one of them I was, uh, I, I needed at one point with my uh wife to get health insurance, and I needed a regular type of job when I had dissolved my company. And I, there are reasons why I didn’t continue to perform continually after I dissolved that company. Um, So I needed a job and I inadvertently. Met with the mayor. In a, uh, in a, in a, in a neighborhood situation and I put my word in that I was looking for a job, and then I was talking with my garbage man showed up and I was talking with them and I’m, I like to be friendly. Uh, do you have any, you know, positions? He said, yeah, this is how you do it. I mean, maybe you can get a job. It’s a great job in many ways. And that was very nice. I spoke with one of the people who was a garbage man and actually was happy to be a garbage man because a lot of them, a lot of them don’t always like to identify as a garbage man, and I ended up becoming a Teamster and, uh, they have fantastic health benefits, and I did the garbage job for 7 years, and it was, A fantastic experience. Where was this? Uh, this was upstate in Binghamton, New York. Binghamton. Oh, the big, so that’s a big town, Binghamton University, SUNY Binghamton. I was on faculty at the university. I was the, you know, we, we were, we, our company was actually, uh, Celebrated, having been given the keys to the city when we did our Letterman gig, and then, then many years later, I found myself in the back of garbage trucks, which was a wild bizarre transition. Yeah. Listen, I always will remember during the pandemic, we recognized the essential services that we have. Um, people who work in food stores, essential, people stocking our food store shelves, um. Uh, restaurants. And of course, for a lot of the restaurants you go, you, you, you’d order and, uh, they’d run it out to you in your car. You didn’t even go in to pick it up. They’d, they’d hustle it out to your car and garbage men, garbage collection, garbage collection is essential. We, we, we, we didn’t need, uh, we didn’t need Silicon Valley, uh, we didn’t need Wall Street. We, we, we would have survived without those, but some, Some, uh, some occupations are absolutely critical, even just with, for a couple of days. We could, we could do fine without Wall Street for a few days or even a week, and I think the, the world would be fine, but, but let your garbage collect, uh, you can’t go food shopping for a week or two. Now you’ve, now you’re really. Experiencing, uh, uh, you know, desperation when, when, when that happens. So we learned what’s truly essential to us. Yeah, when, when, when I was training in ballet in, in Manhattan, uh, you know, I was one of the, uh, scholarship kids at the Joffrey School, right? And, uh, I was very glad for that. But you’re, you’re getting a job someplace and waiting on tables is one of the things, and I think that the garbage job, the waiting on tables, all that type of stuff, I think everybody. deserves to have a certain amount of a tenure as a service person for a period of time in their lives in order to develop an understanding of what it means, you know, there’s, there’s, there’s humility there. There is the challenge of learning to. Drop some of the hoity-toity notion of you’re all that in a bag, you know, I’m all that and a bag of chips, you know, it’s like, no, get over yourself and um. Finding the brilliance in the garbage job was, uh, was something that I was able to enjoy. It’s not always easy, and it’s not always, you know, there’s a lot of grossness to it, but we’re also garbage magicians. People, you know, um, you know, people put their garbage out, they go to work, they come home and the garbage is gone. They didn’t see them, you know, what happened? It’s magic. Yeah, yeah. Whenever my guys come by, I always, uh, I’ll stop what I’m doing. I’ll, I’ll go out on the deck and say thank you. Thank you. Because they, they, here in my town, they wheel the, they wheel the empty bin up like 20 ft or so up to your driveway. Not, not all the way to the house, but they’ll, they’re way off the road. They, so they’re coming close to the house, and I always go out. I, I make a point and go out and say, just thank you. Thank you. Have a great day. You know. If, on a hot day, if, if you’re one of the people who brings them some waters. That will go a very long way, um, when, when you need them to take something that is. Not completely within the rules. If you’ve been good to them, like deliberately giving them, you know, just, you know, here’s some money, treat yourselves to some lunch today on me. It doesn’t have to be more than, you know, 10 or 20 bucks. You know, once a year, when you have something that they could tag. They’re not. They’ll just plain take it. You’re right. You’re right. True, yeah, yeah, it’s a funny little thing. That’s an aside. Maybe I shouldn’t, I, I can’t speak for all of my garbage peeps in the world, but you know, it is a thing, yeah. You make a very good point, uh, about service. If, if not, you know, if we don’t have, we don’t have mandatory service to the country in the US, I think we should, of, of some sort. Uh, it could be military, but uh, I mean, go, go out in Vista, uh, go out in the Peace Corps, if we haven’t dismantled these things completely. But service, service to the, to the country, to your town, to the world, service to others in some form, I think is essential and, and. And, and should be mandatory, uh, maybe after high school or after college or somewhere, uh, instead of, uh, but yeah, everybody, I think, should, should do some service for others, like 2 years. You know, um, and is, is this, is, is this a perfectly reasonable segue to that whole concept of talking about the ask for a moment before we forget it? That’s a very good idea. Yes, because I did forget it and I was gonna, I was gonna wrap us, uh, uh, wrap us up, please. Yeah, it’s absolutely. It’s essential for our audience. Yeah, we’re, we’re all in small and mid-size nonprofits. We’re, we’re asking, we’re soliciting for gifts all the time. Yeah. Yeah, and so, let’s, let’s just, let’s just rewind back for those who are tuning in late. I mentioned something earlier with you, we talked about the essentiality. Um, one of the fascinating concepts with the ask is that people. Sneak up on it in an apologetic way, often, um, in a desperate and hoping way, and. When we tap into the essentiality of the purpose and the why. We want definitely in advance to know the number we’re going to be bringing up. And we. owe it to the Purpose of the meeting, the purpose of the session. To respect the value that this thing that we are asking money for offers the world and the universe. And when we honor that. We can then proudly and unapologetically state for the reason of saving the universe that these people who get where you’re coming from. Deserve to know that you are standing with this number as a truth, and a need, and an essential part of improving. Whatever situation you are contributing to, right? So that allows you to stop. Being cloying to stop being desperate, to stop trying so hard because you’re standing for something that really, really matters. And I think that. Some people may not quite get it, but you can actually stand there and say, if you need me to explain something about why this is so important right now. You can come up to me and we can talk. But It’s the equivalent of saying, you know, the ship is leaving. And I’ll be back. But I’m not waiting for you, and I’m not gonna ask you time and again to get in the car because we have to go now, no. I owe more respect to this thing. This, you know, this widget, this cause, this belief. So I am simply laying it out there. That’s what it is. And this is why. Paul Gordon Paul Gordon. Thank you for bringing us back to that. Thank you, my friend. Yeah, yeah, you’re welcome. I, I, I really I really hope that, you know, I, I, I would, I, I personally would love to hear from any of your folks who reach out to you with questions about this because, you know, of, of course, uh, they will, they, they deserve to pour through your substantial library of fantastic guests with all that valuable information. And if anyone has any curiosities about this, then they can reach out to you. And you know, pass it on to me and, you know, we can, we can speak. I certainly, I certainly will, or they can reach out to you directly at the Paul Gordon.com. They can also find you on LinkedIn. Oh yeah, I have that little LinkedIn bone. Uh, I, there are, I did the real, I did the Paul Gordon. Uh, I, there are 370 some Paul Gordons. I’m not finding you. I looked. I, I am not finding you. Will you connect with me, please? Uh, there are fewer Tony Martignettis than there are Paul Gordon’s. So, so I’m going to send you, uh. The LinkedIn.com/theaul Gordon that does get directly to me. Oh, OK. Oh, that’s true. That’s, uh, that is on the Google page that you shared with me. Oh, that’s right. All right. All right, yeah, yeah, OK. And that’ll be there. And, and, and of course, you know, like. We, we, we could have spoken about so many other things, but the fact is that, you know, with, with a certain punctuality, we can, uh, wrap up and, you know, you can have me back off of other things some other time. But, um, but my, my mean it book teaches people how to do all of these things in order with this no fluff, no bullshit, straight up lessons and exercises, right? And on my, uh, on my website, I have this free deck where you can, uh, press and it will shuffle a prompt for you that you can use in order to be able to use the lessons in my mean it method from, you know, in. The mean it book and you can take that prompt and it will allow you to press record and go in a way that allows you to get out of your own way and actually bring it big, say exactly what you mean. So that’s, that, that’s, you know, the, the deck’s there for free. The mean it book costs a little bit, but, you know, damn, it’s, uh, it’s all right there. It’s all at the Paul Gordon.com. Paul, thank you very much. Very enjoyable, informative and fun, entertaining. Thank you. Thanks so much for sharing with, with me and, and our listeners. Thank you. Tony, it’s a true pleasure, really. It’s, uh, a lot of fun. You’re, uh, you’re, you’re, you are all that in a bag of chips, man. Next week, your board’s role in talent management. If you missed any part of this week’s show, I beseech you, find it at Tony Martignetti.com. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your associate producer Kate Martinetti. The show’s social media is by Susan Chavez. Mark Silverman is our web guy, and this music is by Scott Stein. Thank you for that affirmation, Scotty. Be with us next week for nonprofit radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. Go out and be great.

Nonprofit Radio for September 14, 2026: “Planned Giving Accelerated” & The Martignetti 3-Step, 1-Week Planned Giving Launch

 

Stephen Christopher Nill: “Planned Giving Accelerated” & The Martignetti 3-Step, 1-Week Planned Giving Launch

It’s a first for Nonprofit Radio! Role reversal. Guest Stephen Christopher Nill leads the conversation and interviews Tony about his book “Planned Giving Accelerated: The Cut Through the Sh!t, No-Nonsense, Practical, Step-by-Step Guide to Start Legacy Giving Fundraising at Your Small to Mid-Size Nonprofit Simply in One Week with Bequests (The title may be longer than the book. Did you need a nap?),” launching on 15 September. A major part of the book is the 3-Step, 1-Week Planned Giving Launch.

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Welcome to Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio. Big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. I’m your aptly named host and the pod father of your favorite hebdomadal podcast. Oh, I’m glad you’re with us. I’d be stricken with pulsatile tinnitus if I heard that you missed this week’s show. Here’s our associate producer, Kate, to tell us what’s going on. Hey Tony, here’s what’s going on. Planned giving accelerated and the Martinetti three-step one-week planned giving launch. It’s a first for nonprofit radio. Role reversal. Guest Steven Christopher Nill leads the conversation and interviews Tony about his book. Planned Giving Accelerated. The cut through the shit, no-nonsense, practical, step by step guide to start legacy giving fundraising at your small to mid-size nonprofit simply in one week with bequests. The title may be longer than the book. Did you need a nap? Launching on 15 September. A major part of the book is the 3-step 1 week planned giving launch. On Tony’s take 2. My book is here. Here is Planned Giving accelerated and the Martinetti three-step 1 week planned giving launch. Woohoo! It’s a pleasure to welcome back Steven Christopher Nill, JD who founded Charity Channel in 1992 and built it into one of the world’s largest online communities of nonprofit practitioners. Through charity Channel Press, he has published dozens of books on fundraising and nonprofit governance. Across 4 decades inside development offices and advising hundreds of nonprofits, he has helped raise billions of dollars. You’ll find him writing weekly to development professionals at charitychannel.com. Steve is also on LinkedIn. Steve Neil, welcome back. Tony, it’s uh, it’s always fun to join you on your show. You’re quite a character and I always have a good time. So thank you for having me back. It’s my pleasure. Um, I, I don’t mind being a character. That’s, I, I, I, I, I’m, I’m gracious, I’m grateful for that. Thank you. Um, we’re, so we’re running this episode very differently. This is a first. I’m the guest. Steve is going to lead the conversation. He’ll interview me about my book, Planned Giving Accelerated. You’ve heard rumors about that book, which launches on 15 September, the week we are releasing this episode. Steve I’m in your hands. Tony, um, well, first of all, as you know, um, I’m a publisher and technically still am, although I, uh, not accepting new titles and most of the titles I published are in the rearview mirror now, it’s been so many years. But I have to start with the amazing title of your book, um, the Plan giving accelerated Part. Um, is, is something that even even Wiley might like, but then. The elephant in the room, your subtitle. The cut the. Can I, can I, exclamation point. Oh, no, we say shit now. Let me, let me do it. Uh, comma, no nonsense, comma, practical comma, step by step guide. Longest subtitle I’ve seen in a book, maybe ever, and, um, that, and, and that, that would have had to have given wily acquisition editors. Wait, you didn’t even give it full justice. So let, let me go. OK. It, it’s, it’s planned giving accelerated. The cut through the shit, no-nonsense, practical, step by step guide to start legacy giving fundraising. At your small to mid-size nonprofit simply in one week with bequests. The title may be longer than the book. Did you need a nap? That is so long that I, I didn’t even think that was the the real whole title. And so I, that’s why I left it off. And now that I’m, I’m looking right at it, I see I screwed that up. It, it’s like unbelievably long title and it’s so, it’s so much fun and Um, it tells me right off the bat that this is that I’m gonna be reading and I did a down to earth, um, just a very real, real book on plan giving. And I have to say, even though my press has published more than a few titles on, uh, plan giving and major gifts over, over the decades, um, And we’ve always tried to be down to earth too. You, you take the cake. This is, this, this got my attention. I, you almost made me want to go back into publishing, uh, just to be able to publish your book, but, um, couldn’t quite pull that trigger. But congratulations to you on writing the book you wanted to write because obviously, um, and I understand there’s quite a story behind the whole Wiley thing and But you you’re not gonna tell it without sitting in a bar somewhere with some wine, apparently, um, but I I bet it’s a delicious story and they really missed out if they didn’t pick this up because this is really something. I really, really mean that. It’s a very good read, very enjoyable read. Not something you expect on on a topic like Plan giving. So why don’t we start with this question? From your perspective, what is plan giving fundraising, and what’s its value to nonprofits? And I, I would not normally ask that question because everyone kind of has an idea of what that, what the answer would be, but I don’t think they’re ready for the answer you would give it, so go for it. First, as, as a guest here, I, I, I wanna do what I do when I’m a guest on anyone’s, uh, podcast. I, I thank them. So I, I thank you very much for leading the conversation, uh, uh, here on nonprofit Radio. Thank you for your willingness to do this. You volunteered and I, uh, immediately thought that was a great idea and, and here we are. So, um, um, thank you. Um, thanks also for recognizing the fun. And the accessibility of the title, that’s, that’s why I’m having fun with it. That’s why it’s the cut through the shit, no-nonsense, practical, etc. etc. Um, did you need a nap book? Uh, yeah, uh, I want folks to know that this is, this is accessible planned giving. This is practitioner level, not academic. The, uh, this is a book that you’re not gonna find it, uh, Columbia University, uh, nonprofit fundraising management, uh, master’s degree curriculum. They’re not, they’re not gonna, they’re not gonna make this book part of their coursework. Uh, but it, I didn’t write it for them. It’s for practitioners. Um, and there’s a little side story too, the, the two major nonprofit, uh, sort of, I think, legacy media outlets, uh, refused the book. They wouldn’t, they wouldn’t excerpt it, they wouldn’t review it. I guess they, they believe it has to be, uh, an academic tome to be worthwhile, uh, in their limited minds in their limited scope of what planned giving is. So that’s, that’s ancient thinking, uh, and that’s what I’m fighting against with the audacious title and just the whole idea that you can have fun with planned giving. And it can likewise be easy, uh, and accessible and affordable. So thank you for recognizing that. And, and I, I didn’t forget your questions, but thank you. Well, I want to thank you. Um, we, we resonate on that because the whole reason I started Charity Channel Press was to find authors like you who, who were very down to earth. And, and just didn’t try to gussy everything up in academic prose all the time and that’s, uh, so you’re kind of my hero. I really. Let me ask you though, I, I know I, I, you, I didn’t answer your first question. I’d love to get into the myths of plan giving. All right, I didn’t answer your first question though. Did you, did you want me to go ahead. I’m still answer your first question. I, I took an elaborate, you know, I was, I’m being, uh, I’m trying to be a gracious guest. I’m, I’m being thankful. Um, yeah, the value of planned giving, uh, it, it’s sustainability. Uh, start that with endowment growth, lots of planned gifts, and the one that I focused on in the book, gifts and wills, come as lots of, I mean, the vast overwhelming majority of gifts and wills come as the most desirable type of gift any nonprofit can get, unrestricted cash. And I recommend putting as much of that unrestricted cash as possible. I realize there are constraints. We gotta keep salaries paid. We gotta keep the rent paid, etc. but as much as possible, put that into endowment, which helps create and support your, your mission’s sustainability in your community. And for a small nonprofit or a medium sized nonprofit who I, I gather those are the two, markets that your, your book written to, I shout them out in the title to at your small or mid-size nonprofit. I’m promising this is, this, this book is for you in small and mid-size shops. And so building, building an endowment may not even be on their radar screen by the time they pick up your book, but after they’re done reading it, I think they’re going to be able to see that they can do that and you’re showing them the way to do that. Is that right? Exactly. Yeah. If you have zero endowment, like I, I, I say, and, uh, like Grandpa Martinetti used to say in his broken New Jersey Italian accent, none you worry. None you worry. You, if you have a zero endowment, you, you, everybody, every nonprofit had a 0 endowment at some stage, you can launch. You can launch with those first planned gifts when they come to fruition. This is, it’s doable. It’s very, very doable for small and mid-size nonprofits. I guess what I, what I’d like to get, get into a little bit here is if, if I, I’m and I have, I have started some small nonprofits and and um have been in that role myself. If, if I’m, if I’m seeing executive director, um, maybe we do or don’t have a development person on staff, probably don’t in some, in many cases. And, and I think about plan giving. I think about all these really super technical kinds of of things like charitable trusts and and. Um, calculating deductions and, and income streams and, and, and, and all that stuff, and I think, man, we are just nowhere near being ready for that. What would you say to that executive director, Tony? Yeah, they’re buying into, uh, one of Tony’s top 6 myths of planned giving. Uh, and one of those is that we have to offer lots of gift options. So that means we have to train up our staff on the, the, the, the plan giving methods you mentioned, and, and I often cite the, the nuances of a charitable remainder unit trust with net income makeup provisions. Which, which really does exist. Uh, yeah, so we, our staff has to get educated. We, we, we’re gonna need a year of professional development in planned giving before we can be confident to, to meet our donors and talk to them about planned giving. You, you’re, you’re buying into a myth that, uh, I, I despise. Um, it is, it, it’s a myth. It’s one of Tony’s top 6 myths. You launch your planned giving with the most basic, the simplest, the most easily understood planned gift there is. gifts in wills, also called charitable bequests, they mean the exact same thing. And there are 3 things about gifts and wills that are, are about wills that make these sort of universally understood, because nearly every American adult knows what a will is, how will works, and that they need to have a will. Those 3 things are in your favor, that they, along with, uh, 17 other reasons, because in the, in the book I have the Martinetti, 18 reasons why. Gifts and wills are the place to launch your planned giving. So I don’t just have one reason. There are lots of reasons why gifts and wills are the place to launch planned giving for, for small and mid-sized nonprofits. You listed 18 of them in the book and um with the first one being they’re the most popular plan gift by far. Uh, is that true? Wills, um, gifts from wills outpace a charitable remainder trusts or life insurance trusts and things like that. Yeah, by far, um, you, you, you, you’d expect to see at least 75% of All the planned gifts in, in any planned giving program. You can name the, name the largest nonprofits you can think of in the country, uh, uh, Harvard with whatever $50 or $70 billion dollar endowment or go to the other coast, uh, the University of California system or Go to the University of Chicago or the Cleveland Clinic or go to down to Texas, University of Texas system. Um, where in, where, where can we pick in the heartland? I don’t know, University of Missouri, University of Oklahoma, um, Wyoming. At least 3/4 of the planned gifts in, in any of those programs are simple gifts and wills. And in some smaller shops that I’ve worked with, I’ve seen it be as high as 90% of all the gifts are these basic, simple, charitable bequests, gifts and wills. Yeah, by far the, the most popular. So, if, if I’m a, if I’m running a small to middle sized nonprofit, Tony, what would be reasonable for me to expect in terms of um what my agency will receive over say 5 years if I start a program and according to how you suggest doing that in the book, how should I view that? Uh, well, in terms of dollars, uh, the dollars received, I mean, gifts and wills mean that this is cash to your nonprofit when that planned giving donor has died. So, this is long-term fundraising. I make that very clear. Uh, so 5 years, there are metrics, we could talk about what metrics you might use in the, in those 5 years, but, you know, the likelihood of someone dying. In those 5 years, uh, I guess it’s kind of small, unless someone very elderly in their, maybe in their 80s or 90s has put you in their will, because you’ve launched Plan giving and they were one of your top prospects. So that’s a possibility. But, you know, folks in their 60s, 70s, 80s, they’re most likely gonna live at least 5 years. So, you know, the, the, the dollars realized would be, wouldn’t, I wouldn’t expect to realize many planned gifts in just 5 years. If you want, so it’s a longer scope, but it’s mentioned in the book, the average charitable class is $35,000 right? The average is $35,000 in the US. Yes. Um, it’s just that you have to wait, you know, for people to die for this to become cash. So, again, very clear, this is long-term fundraising for your nonprofit. So, if, if I’m, if I’m looking at a program like this, and I have all of the needs of uh of, of a smaller middle-sized nonprofit in front of me, uh, obviously current giving is gonna look very attractive to me. But to the extent that, that I want to start building an endowment or, you know, providing for the future, I’m not gonna have a lot of assets to invest to do that. I’m not gonna be able to train staff and, and do all the things that I would think of as a plan giving program. But you turn that on its head, you make the argument. Very well, that the investment is really low to achieve the results you’re talking about. Tell us about that. You’re, you’re, you’re kind of, uh, like pecking at the Martinetti 3-step 1 week planned giving launch. It’s, it’s 3, the 3 steps are, are the 1st 3 chapters of the book, and, and they’re all identify your top prospects. That’s step 1, right? Yes it is. I read your book. Launch with gifts and wills. That’s Step 2. That’s chapter 2. Step 2, yes. And then cultivate and solicit your top prospects. Step 3, right? That’s right. Those are the 1st 3 chapters of the book. Within a week of reading those 1st 3 chapters, you can launch planned giving at your nonprofit because launching means. You’ve had your first conversation. Whether it was a cultivation or solicitation, that’s gonna depend on the, the top prospect who you had that very first meeting with, depending on what stage your relationship is with them. But that’s the launch. There’s not a campaign. There’s not a press release, there’s not a four color brochure even. You don’t need a web page. You don’t even, you don’t need a website. You don’t need a web page. You just start having conversations with your top prospects and of course I talk about step one, how to identify those top prospects. But you’re right, it’s not, not only is it not expensive, it’s just, it’s, it’s wildly affordable. You have everything you need. You have the data in your CRM database to get the top prospects. You’re just gonna go query on longevity and consistency and loyalty of giving. And of course, I go into a lot more detail. And then you start with gifts and wills, and that’s where I make the case with the Martin Etti 18 reasons why gifts and wills are the place to launch. So you know you’re, you’re comfortable starting with gifts and wills, and that’s, that’s the, that’s the primary, actually, more than the primary. That’s the sole focus of your marketing and promotion, which, uh, I get lots of marketing tips in another chapter. And then step 3, that’s where you actually start having the, as you said, the cultivation and, and solicitation conversations with those top prospects you identified in step 1. You have everything you need. You have the data. Now you, now you know to start with gifts and wills, and you have the relationships. You’re talking to people who love your work. We know you’re, we know they love it because they’ve been supporting it for, for 1520, 25 years in some cases. Those are your loyal, committed donors that you identify at step one, chapter one of the book, and you open the conversations with those folks. That’s your launch. Conversations with committed loyal donors about a gift in their will, celebrate that. You’ve launched Planned giving when you’ve had that first conversation. That seems so simple. Um, I, you know, you, you and I have, have a lot of years in the planned giving arena and we know how complicated things can get. Um, I hate that. I hate it. I, I get that. I get that you hate that, and you’re starting to make me hate that too, even though I love the, uh, I love the technical aspects from my, from my own career, but You make this really accessible by focusing on. The, uh, sort of, I’m not even gonna call it the lowest rung of the ladder because frankly, it’s the lion’s share of gifts that come through it, so that doesn’t do it justice. And it’s also the, the, the most direct and straightforward thing that you can ask somebody to do because everyone knows they need a will and You don’t have to tell them what it is, and yet if they salt your organization in there as a bequest, um, your, your organization at some point is going to receive a significant gift, right? I mean, it’s, it’s just so accessible. That’s what amazed me about, about, um, your approach. Yeah, I, that’s, that’s exactly what I want folks to recognize that it is accessible and affordable and easy for small and mid-sized nonprofits. Uh, you, you’ve, you just characterized it perfectly. So, I wanna hear about the um uh OK, let me, let me, let me say this. I laughed out loud and all kinds of places in the book, especially the footnotes and and I’m gonna confess here that my, my years as a publisher. Conditioned me to hate footnotes, Tony, and I even mentioned that to you not long ago. And I suspect that if, if I had published your book, you and I would have had to arm wrestle over, over footnotes and, and that would be my bad because as I look at it with fresh eyes. Uh, there is so much fun in the, in, in, in your humor that you, you would miss if you don’t read those footnotes. So I’m gonna, I’m gonna withdraw my, my stupid publisher’s knee jerk reaction about footnotes and, um, eat my words because I was wrong. I was really wrong. And if, if you don’t read Tony’s footnotes, you’ve missed at least half the fun of, of his, of his book. It’s, they’re so fun and refreshing. Um, So tell us, I, I, I, I used to have this thing called Nil’s breakfast rule um back in the late 90s that I wrote about where I would take financial advisors, you know, uh financial planners, insurance people, bankers, real estate people to breakfast every morning. And Um, cultivate them to, to, to send me clients, nonprofit, um, or potential clients who would make major gifts to, to nonprofit organizations. I call that Nils. Breakfast rule and, and it, you know, it was a key, a key thing that led to my success in that, in those, in those days. Then I read Martin Etti’s meal plan and you’re like, wow, I, I had to learn what that is. So why don’t you tell us what is Martin Etti, what is the Martignetti meal plan? Uh, thank you. Yeah, um. MEAL is an acronym in, in that, uh, which stands for Meals Expertly Allow Learning. I, I put this forth because I love doing donor and prospect meetings over meals. I, I’m an Italian guy. Food is very important to me, but beyond my love of food, I think there’s real value to having meetings over a restaurant meal. It doesn’t matter. Breakfast, you had your breakfast, you had your breakfast rule. I’m surprised you didn’t call it Breakfast Club. Neil’s Breakfast Club, like NBC or The Breakfast Club, like the Breakfast Club movie, the movie from the 80s, but you were just way more creative than I am. You had a rule. All right, you, it was a rule instead of a club. It’s more, uh, it sounds more authoritative as a rule than a club, um. So first you start with the shared space. We’re, we’re, we’re sharing a physical space, a table. I’m not talking about sharing meals. I don’t, I don’t pass my, my, uh, my lunch over to, to the donors to share, no, but we’re sharing a physical space. So I feel like I’m in community with a donor or maybe it’s a donor couple, you know, they may be spouses or partners I’m meeting, but usually it’s one on one. I feel like I’m in community with the person because we’re in a shared physical space. We’re sharing that table. And then the other advantage. Is the, the, the understood. Just the universally recognized cadence of a restaurant meal. We know when there’s gonna be a short pause, like after the server takes the drink order, and the drink might, you know, it’s something that’s not necessarily alcohol, it might be iced tea and water. We’re, we’re, you know, but then we’re gonna have like 3 or 5 minutes before the beverages come. Um, and then they’re gonna take our, that’s a short break, so you can kind of pace your conversation around the, the milestones and everybody understands what the milestones are. Both, everybody at the table knows because every, every, every adult knows how restaurant meals get, get paced out. Uh, and then you know, after you give your entree order, then you’ve got about maybe 10 minutes when the entree comes, so you pace yourself around that. And then when the entree comes, then you know if you’ve got 1520 minutes while you’re eating your entrees. So, the, these milestones, you can, as the professional fundraiser, kind of time and pace your, your conversation around them and, As the server comes, these are sort of natural valuable breaks. Maybe you want to shift the conversation. Maybe you want to, maybe you don’t, but you can use those breaks as a, as a pivot opportunity because there’s been the, because the server has come. So, I, I think between the, the shared space and being in community and the understood and, uh, universally recognized cadence of a restaurant meal, I think there’s a big advantage around, um, you pacing your conversations at, at restaurant meals. I, I am quick to add though, For some folks who may not be comfortable with that, maybe they don’t like the idea of a social setting for this, for this conversation or for any of their donor prospect meetings. Uh, maybe they’re worried about alcohol, like if, if my donor orders alcohol, do I have to, but I don’t drink or I don’t want to drink at a business meal or awkwardness around who’s gonna pick up the check. If there’s anything that concerns you about doing this in a restaurant, then don’t. Then you, you do it the way you do meetings best. Your office, their office, their home, those sound like the most three likely or it could be some other, some other place that’s, that’s not a, a, a, a restaurant. You do it the way you are most comfortable, for sure. I just, I, I put forth the, the Martignetti meal plan because I see value in it and I wanna share it with the readers. Well, that makes it very down to earth and and and practical, doesn’t it? And I think that’s brilliant. I really do. It’s time for Tony’s take 2. Thank you, Kate. My book is here. 15th of September. That’s the launch date. You can get it. It’s at Amazon, it’s at Barnes and Noble. You just look for planned giving accelerated. And it will come up. Hard copy version, paperback version, Kindle version. I’ve got you covered. The audio version will be coming, but not for a couple of months. audiobook version, that, that, that, that’s coming later. Right now, hardcover, paperback, Kindle. Amazon or Barnes and Noble. Wherever fine books are sold. Woo. Uh, my gratitude again to Steve Nell for this week’s show, for interviewing me about the book. You know, it’s, it’s been a journey. And uh you’ve been along with me. I’ve shared all about my, the process, the editors. The legacy media that turned me down. Different milestones through the journey. So I thank you for being with me through the journey too. Somehow I feel like it’s not quite over. I don’t know why. It just feels it’s too abrupt. It can’t really be done. I mean, it is done, but it’s done, but it’s not over. See, it just feels like there’s gonna be more to, more to say about the book. We’ll see. Just feels that way. So, but the book is here. Wherever fine books are sold. Barnes and Noble and Amazon. And that is Tony’s take 2. Kate. Congratulations, Uncle Tony. This is a very big milestone. Um, also, this is the first time I think I’ve ever said your book’s name all the way through. It’s a lot of fun. That’s the idea. Thank you. Thank you for your good wishes. Um, yeah, that’s the whole idea. I want people to see in the, in the, in the title. What’s it called? The title, that’s what the, that’s the word. That, uh, this is a fun book. Absolutely, absolutely. A lot of good humor in there. I think you should say it one more time all the way through, real quick. You do, huh? OK, I won’t turn you down. Planned giving accelerated, the cut through the shit, no nonsense, practical, step by step guide to start legacy giving fundraising at your small to mid-size nonprofit. Simply in one week with bequests. The title may be longer than the book. Did you need a nap? Thank you. We’ve got Beu butt loads more time. Here’s the rest of Planned Giving Accelerated and the Martinetti three-step, one week planned giving launch with guest host, Steven Christopher Nill. I want to kind of circle back to to the myths of planned giving because. You know your book is about plan giving, but it is not. It doesn’t accept the the normal sorts of approaches to plan giving that you read in so many, so many books that are published on on the subject and I’ll be honest, I published a couple of those myself, um, you know, so I’m right there too, and You, you start with plan giving is not only for wealthy donors. Explain that. This is ideal, Steve, for your, your modest donors, your, your donors who make small gifts during lifetime, because there’s no lifetime cost to this. This is, this is gonna come from their estate. At their death, there’ll be a gift of cash to your nonprofit. So it’s ideal for modest donors, and you’re making a huge mistake. You’re leaving a lot of money on the table. If you think this is only for your major donors. Your wealthy donors, your board members, maybe, if they’re wealthy. Yeah, they’re good prospects. They could be very, very good prospects. But they are not your sole prospects for planned giving. It is not wealth-based. Someone who makes gifts like for the durations that I was talking about 1520, 25 years or more in some nonprofits. If, literally, if their average gift was $5 and they’ve done that all those years. And even if they lapsed a couple of years in the past, you know, but they came back, they’re not currently lapsed. Then they are an ideal prospect for planned giving, for a gift in their will. They think about you all the time, year after year after year, right? Even at a $5 level. Odds are they wish they could give more while they’re, uh, while they’re living, these lifetime gifts. But for whatever reason, they give at the $5 level, but they do it so regularly and they’ve been doing it for so many years. They’re a great plan-giving prospect. So, you don’t wanna make this only for your wealthy donors. That’s, that’s a big mistake. Like I said, leaves, leaves a lot of money on the table from, from very modest donors because That this kind of gets into something else I talked about the planned giving multiplier. People have so much more capacity to give through their estate than they do their income while they’re living. They don’t need it anymore, right? They don’t need it anymore. It’s now going to their dear loved ones and to your nonprofit, if you’re asking them. So, um, they, they have a lot more wealth in their estate, and you just don’t want to make assumptions, uh, uh, around what someone’s wealth is based on their lifetime giving. That’s a huge mistake. I’ve seen. Donors with a, like a $1500 total lifetime giving, not annually, total lifetime giving, $1500. 6 and 7 figure gifts uh in, in their wills. And that’s the multiplier. How many more times. Uh, a gift in someone’s will is greater than their total lifetime giving. So, in that case, you know, the multiplier can be in the thousands. Well, myth two is plan giving is too complicated. Uh, boy, oh boy, that is the accepted truth, um, out there, isn’t it? I mean, that’s, that’s got to be the closed door you’re trying to pry back open, right? Yeah, it’s not complicated when you launch correctly. Um, you don’t even give the language that somebody can drop into their will. Actually, I appreciated that. It was very practical in that regard. Simple bequest, yeah, a simple bequest. That is really not complicated. take it to their lawyer, but When it comes down to it, it’s a, it’s a single clause in a will, and you give them the sample language that they take to their lawyer. Yeah, either go to your lawyer or some folks complicated, yeah, or, or some folks are doing it online now, more, more online now than do their will online. But either way, yes, I give them a, I give you a sample bequest paragraph for, for you to share with folks to drop. Into their will. Uh, yeah, that’s it, you know, it, it is simple, Steve, and I, I, look, I, I don’t want to diminish the other planned gifts. I, I talk about them, I stuff them into, not even a chapter though, an appendix. All the, the gifts of life insurance and the charitable trusts you were talking about and qualified charitable distributions and, and gifts from IRAs. Well, that is a qualified charitable distribution, naming beneficiaries, all those, all those other valuable gifts. But that’s not where you launch. That’s not where you launch. You launch with the simplest, the most common, the most popular planned gift by far. And again, I’ve got the 18 reasons why in the book, why you start with, with gifts and wills. So, Those other plant gifts can be valuable, but you can go into those in future years if you want to. But just take comfort knowing you don’t have to. You can have a wildly successful planned giving program 20 years from now, and all you’ve ever done is promote simple gifts and wills. Let’s go to myth 3. Plan giving requires expertise, um. So here, here I am, uh, an attorney who spent decades, um, in the field and, and, uh, uh, I, I felt it took a great deal of expertise, but you’ve debunked that myth and I, I think that’s really interesting. Tell us why it doesn’t require expertise. Well, I’m with you. I, I, I’m a former attorney and I’m a current planned giving consultant, and I, I, I’m telling you, you don’t need an attorney or a consultant, and I don’t mean just on staff, I mean on your board, as a consultant, as an advisor, you don’t need them. Uh, because you’re keeping it so simple. You’re talking about gifts and wills. Everybody understands, again, what a will is, how wills work, and if they need to have one for themselves. Those three things are in your favor. You don’t need a consultant. You don’t need a lawyer. You don’t need expertise at all. You just need what you’ve already got. The data in your database. Knowledge that you launch with gifts and wills and the relationships, that’s where you start with those cultivation and solicitation conversations with your top prospects. You have everything you need in-house. You don’t need anything more. And your fourth myth you’ve you’ve addressed, which is plan giving means offering lots of, of gift options and you do, as you say, um, move the more advanced, uh, concepts and, and, and techniques into an appendix which I appreciated very much because. You’ve made the case so well that a bequest program is really going to be very powerful and very attainable. And so, getting into the more exotic instruments, which require a tremendous amount of of expertise, but produce a relatively low amount of um results compared to the simpler bequests. Um, I thought that was brilliant and, um, so, so myth number 4 is, is totally busted, um, and even with me, and I, and I completed a lot of structured gifts that were very complex over over the years and Uh, and even I saw that, you know what, a bequest program gets you what, 80% of the way there with like 5%, not even that, of, of the resources to do. I made those percentages up, Tony, you, you’d have to correct me, but small amount of resources with a whole lot of leverage in terms of results with the, with the bequest program. Yeah, you just start having meetings with those top prospects that, that you identify in step one. And again, those, you know, I had some early readers, you know, the beta readers, uh, a couple suggested that I take out all the, uh, I originally had them when I was at the early writing stage, I originally had a chapter devoted to all the, all the gifts beyond bequests, and some of those early readers suggested I remove the chapter because it’s contrary to my, my thesis that you don’t need them. Uh, they felt like they’re, they’re unnecessary. You make a whole case. All you need is bequests. And then, you know, you, and then you, and then you add in all the, all the others in a, in a chapter. So I, I took the advice halfway. I relegated them to an appendix. It’s sort of, it’s a resource so that if someone does talk about another type of gift that they are interested in, or in a couple of years, I say, I suggest like after 2 to 3 years of devoting your planned giving program. To bequests, then if you wanna expand, you’ve got the resource in in the appendix. um, those gifts can be valuable but not for launch at a smaller mid-size nonprofit Steve we just, we’re trying to, we gotta stay focused we’ve got bandwidth constraints we’ve got budget constraints. I guess bandwidth and capacity are the, are the same thing. So, Small and mid-size shops you focus, you focus on what’s essential. Identify your top prospects. Start with gifts and wills. And cultivate and solicit those top prospects. 3 steps. That’s the way to launch. Now, uh, myth 5 plan giving will hurt our other fundraising, um. Talk about that. Yeah, also untrue, like, like the others, um. I’ve seen through the years, I’ve been doing planned giving since 1997, I’ve seen probably thousands of people who have made a planned gift commitment, a gift by will. Let’s focus it on gift and will. A gift by will, and they’ve increased their other giving to that same nonprofit. Now, Those are anecdotes, um, almost 30 years’ worth, but still anecdotes. So you, you can, uh, rely on the, Quantitative research of Professor Russell James at Texas Tech University, who wrote the foreword for your book. I’m very grateful. He, he signs on to the, to the easiest, the, the, the way to launch planned giving at a smaller mid-sized nonprofit, keeping it simple. Yes, he wrote the foreword. I’m very grateful for. Um, and he has quantitative research. So one of his studies, his, his, his area of research at Texas Tech is planned giving fundraising. That’s what he studies. And he has a study that showed that, uh, for folks who make a gift commitment, uh, a gift by will, promise, On average, 75% of those folks will increase their other giving to that same nonprofit. So during their lifetime, during their life, yeah, but lifetime giving on average 75% will increase. So the myth, uh, that myth like all the others, uh, falls. Well, and the final myth, actually not the final one, let’s see, you have 6 myths or 7, 6, 6 myths. Um, Tony’s Tony’s top 6 myths of, uh, playing. Um, Tony’s top 6 myths of plan giving. And the 6th 1 is, it’s, it’s, it’s the dreaded death conversation that, that you’re talking to somebody about their, their death. It’s really uncomfortable. They don’t want to talk about it. You don’t want to bring it up. And that’s what this is all about. That’s the myth. What’s the truth of that? Yeah, this one is particularly heinous to me. Um, I, I’ve got the top 6 myths. I put 5 of them in one chapter. This one, It is so, uh, so hateful, uh, and so insidious that I devote its own short chapter to it, that this is a death conversation, as you said, and we just, I flipped that on its head. It’s a conversation about life, the life, the life, longevity and sustainability of your nonprofit’s work in your community. Because Steve, that’s what. You as the professional fundraiser or readers have in common with long term loyal committed donors, the love of your work, we know they love it because they’ve been supporting it for in some cases decades, we know you love it because you’re fundraising for it. So across all the things in this country currently that could divide us, whether that’s politics or age or geography or gender or identity or. Whatever You have this in common. You both love the work and the planned gift that you’re talking about, the simple gift in the will, is designed and is going to prevent the ugly future where your work ceases in your community 25, 30 years from now. You both know, you and your donor, your long term committed donors, you both know how important the work is in the community and that it has to survive, so. Again, put the myth on its head. It’s not at all about death. You’re not talking to folks about their death. You’re talking about the life and longevity of your work in your community. That’s powerful. That really is powerful. That’s the focus of the conversations, every one of them. Well, Thank you for debunking those six myths, some of which I signed on to, um, myself, and, uh, I, I’m looking at it from a completely different perspective and that, that’s super, super interesting and valuable. And even though you write in a really down to earth kind of no BS way, Tony, and just call it like it is. You’ve got some profound things in in here that surprised me and delighted me to read and really made me think, and I appreciated that, um. And anytime I thought you were getting a little bit too, too technical or something, which was very rarely, I just go read one of your footnotes and start cracking up. So, you know. I’m glad the footnotes work for you. They, they do, they do. I worry that, I worry that, um, there’s so much fun that they take you away from reading the, the, the other parts of it, but in, in the, in the final analysis, the, the whole book is, is a package that, and it’s, it’s pure, Tony, I mean, I don’t, I, I haven’t spent a lot of time with you, but when, when I have, you, you’ve got this. A sense of humor that I’ve come to appreciate and it comes through in the book so well and it, it’s the opposite of a dry book on plan giving. I mean, this, even if you didn’t care about plan giving, it’s a fun read, to be honest, and, uh, I, I really recommend it highly. I really do. And, uh, and then once again, I find myself wishing I’d published it. Oh, you’re very gracious. Thank you, Steve. Thank you. Well, it’s, I mean it, and I, I guess. I, you know, I, I’d like to. Find out, um. Your thoughts on where you want to leave folks, before we we close this this this time together out, um. And also I’d like to make sure we mention where people can find your book once it’s launched because that’s important too. I, I, what I’d like to leave folks with is, is. The willingness to shift. The mindset that planned giving is Undoable, uh, it’s inaccessible. It’s out of reach for small and mid-size nonprofits that this is only for big medical and education institutions. That’s false, categorically false. I’ve done it for years working with small and mid-size nonprofits, launching and growing planned giving programs. That’s, that’s why this is the Martinetti three-step one week planned giving launch. I mean, that’s the, uh, I, I, I want you to understand that you can be very, very successful at planned giving in your small or mid-size nonprofit. That’s, that’s why I name you out, call you out in the. I guess I should say shout you out. And sometimes I, I get the, the colloquialisms all wrong. It’s a shout out, right? Not a call out. Call out is bad. I shout you out in the title. The book is for you. You in your small or mid-size nonprofit can be wildly successful at planned giving. Focus your launch, 3 steps, the 1st 3 chapters of the book. So I’d ask for a mindset shift that we can’t do it. It’s, it’s, it’s not for us. That’s, that’s wrong. That’s wrong. And I, I, The book proves it to you and it sounds like you’re convinced, Steve. Um, so I, I thank you for recognizing that when you’re launching, you stay focused in your small and mid-size nonprofit, and you can be very, very successful at planned giving. So thank you for recognizing that too. Well, you made it, you’ve made it very attainable by a busy, harried, uh, small nonprofit staff, however large that staff may be, usually under-resourced. And you’ve really eliminated any possible reason not to launch such a program, Tony. I really, um, commend you for that. And I’m assuming, uh, oh, I wanted to ask you, you also, besides the book, you also offer a course on this. So tell us a little bit about that too before we, uh, I can’t be too, yeah, the, the course will be maybe next year. I thought I was doing, I thought I was doing both, became too much. Uh, I, I, I was too ambitious. So, well, maybe I’ll interview you, uh, when that’s launched. I’d love to, by the way, if, if it’s available to do that. Um, absolutely. Folk, let’s we’re now I’m, I’m focused on the book this year. So we’re focused on the book and you asked where you could get the book. Um, you, uh, it’s wherever fine books are sold, um, which means Amazon and Barnes and Noble in our, in our times. All the book info you can find at plannedgiving accelerated.com. Starting September 15th, that, well, this, when, by this, when this comes out, um, on the 15th, the, the, the, the sale links at each of those, you know, at Amazon and Barnes and Noble will be at that site. So you can either go right to the sellers or you can go to plannedgiving accelerated.com. OK. Tony, this has been a pleasure. Thanks for letting me turn the tables on you. You, you normally interview, uh, everybody and, and you interviewed me, uh, once, and, um, thank you for letting me, uh, interview you. This was fun. I hope you’ll do more of this, uh. Um, if you’re, you know, hopefully, uh, uh, somebody else would like to do that too, but I’m certainly willing to come back and talk to you about the course once that launches. So anyway, OK, I’m not, I’m not sure. Uh, it’s, it’s a little awkward, but, uh, it’s still fun. I don’t mean, I don’t mean that it’s fun. It’s just, uh, it’s awkward, uh, but, uh, it’s, it is fun, and I, I thank you again. I, I thank you for your willingness to do it. You, you volunteered. It was your idea and, uh, I, I, I thought it was a great one. So I, I thank you very much for doing this, Steve. Oh, you’re very welcome, Tony. Thanks for thanks for being a good sport about it too. I hope others other people have enjoyed it as much as I have. Next week There’s been too much going on. We just don’t know. Absolutely. Lackluster host, uh, just, there’ll be a show, I promise you that. If you missed any part of this week’s show, I beseech you, find it at Tony Martignetti.com. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your. Uh, I don’t know who I am. Got too excited. Our creative producer is Claire Meyerhoff. I’m your associate producer Kate Martinetti. The show’s social media is by Susan Chavez. Mark Silverman is our web guy, and this music is by Scott Stein. Thank you for that affirmation, Scotty. Be with us next week for nonprofit radio, big nonprofit ideas for the other 95%. Go out and be great.